# Rant:When people pet/touch my Pixie without asking...



## NinaN (May 13, 2013)

... it makes me really mad. Most of the time it happens on public transportation as she will be on my lap and more noticeable (and easier to reach). Pixie likes to travel, will curl up and snooze or even fall asleep. I really want it stay like that! Some people will compliment me on my cute dog, some just talk to Pixie, completely ignoring me, some don't say a single word. Then, without a warning a hand reaches out and tries to touch her. It feels like my dog is public property. And I feel disturbed, too. I want to relax on the train. Read my new book, write an email or just daydream... My upbringing prevents me from making rude comments. Even when I'm about to explode. I try to explain, that I like to be asked first and it's not wise to touch a sleeping dog. Most people don't listen at all and just nod and you can absolutely visualize them petting the next 'cute' dog. Or they get snappy - if you can't touch a dog as you like it should wear a muzzle, or worse... :angryfire: It is normal dog behavior to me if a dog is just woken up by a (n unknown) person (on top of that) that he/she might growl or show other signs of discomfort. Pixie's behavior is actually out of the ordinary. Being absolutely quiet and submissive. So I guess they assume it's ok to touch her. 

I find this very intrusive and rude. Am I too sensitive? Maybe, but I've had Pixie for close to 3 months now and she is still hard to 'read' and is opening up very slowly. (She just started to wag her tail for something that had nothing to do with food. That made me so happy!)
That's not only my impression. I can see that she is uncomfortable to some extent when strangers touch her. But she doesn't growl and doesn't retreat from the hand. She will look at me somewhat puzzled and will sit there patiently until it's over. I don't have the impression that she is shy. She simply doesn't seem to enjoy it.


I don't want to put her through that. I want her to be happy and that she feels safe in any situation. 

On a sidenote: to date I had never issues with kids. Those who wanted to pet her asked very politely beforehand and were very understanding if I told them 'no'. 

Sorry for the lengthy rant. I really needed to vent...


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## Winstonsmum (Jul 2, 2013)

YES! You are so right!! 

When I took Winston to the vets the first time for his bad jaw and cut ear we were walking out back to the car and a man just shouted and came over to us to stroke him, I was like no dont touch him hes in pain!! Honestly, why do people think its ok??

Then when I took him to the vet again, a lady got really close to his face and let him lick her face. I'm not comfortable in that situation, especially considering he is a puppy and likely to nip the face as well!! Plus really the only people whos faces I want him anywehere near is mine or the OH's when we give him kisses!!

And then again at the vet, we were sat in the waiting room and a couple let their huge great dog come over and sniff him, I could tell my little baby was terrified! And so was I (I'm extremely weary of bigger dogs) and thats when my manners went out the window and I just got up and moved away! No-one is going to put my babys safety in danger! I didnt know this big dog and could never know how he'd react! It's so irresponsible! Another couple even let their child come and sit next to me and ask me if he could hold Winston, I was like erm really? I know he was a child so didnt know that no chi mummy is going to willingly give up their baby (especially a poorly one) to a child they dont know to hold! But his parents should have known better... grrr I fully understand your rant! I think chis just attract so much attention, yes I know my little man is gorgeous and the cutest little thing in the world but dont intrude!


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## miuccias (Aug 22, 2012)

Boy, I must be weird! I love when people WANT to touch my pups, I feel so blessed and happy that people like them that much.
I am never in a rush for anything so I keep stopping when people want to mini play with them no matter what time, it makes me happy!!!!
I am a strong socialization believer and want to expose my pups to as many people as possible, if it will be ok for only friends and family to touch them, well that will be too little IMO. People have never hold them and always gone to the ground to touch them, I want to clarify that I live in VIENNA - AUSTRIA.

We go to the doggie park and I am very happy when another dog is sniffing my pups they are still (after a year of constant socialization training) a little bit afraid but it will get better. Also I am always prepare of anything unexpected but so far nothing bad has happened.
Touching a dog while sleeping is disturbing and it's not OK!
And I must say that I also think people should always ask before petting someone else's dog.

If you feel that strongly about people touching your dog then I think you should be really direct and say "please don't touch my dog" I understand you wouldn't want to be rude but I think that's the only way.


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## Winstonsmum (Jul 2, 2013)

miuccias said:


> Boy, I must be weird! I love when people WANT to touch my pups, I feel so blessed and happy that people like them that much.
> I am never in a rush for anything so I keep stopping when people want to mini play with them no matter what time, it makes me happy!!!!
> I am a strong socialization believer and want to expose my pups to as many people as possible, if it will be ok for only friends and family to touch them, well that will be too little IMO. People have never hold them and always gone to the ground to touch them, I want to clarify that I live in VIENNA - AUSTRIA.
> 
> ...


haha you're not weird at all  I think because each of my encounters was at the vets when Winston wasnt well and in pain i naturally had my guard up. He has been introduced to lots of people that I know since we've had him, and he loves new people. I'm probably more wary of other dogs because Winston is the smallest dog I have ever had and to me something bad could happen so fast and it would kill me if anything happened to him! I've always had very muscly black labs so never really had the need to worry about them meeting new dogs.

Winston is meeting Bella next week, my grandparents cocker spaniel, then we have a play date with a friends Jack Russell another day. I do want him to get used to other dogs, but I'll start small otherwise i think i'd have a mental breakdown lol


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## NinaN (May 13, 2013)

@miuccias
Oh no, I want to socialize Pixie as much as possible. That's why I take her with me everywhere she's allowed to go. And I have seen big improvements especially when I walk her in the city. She is way more relaxed and follows me without hesitation. She's actually 1 - 2 years old and her previous owner did a very good job in socializing her. As she is fine with dogs of any size, kids, cats (she loves them but they don't love her back. Poor thing), car rides, train rides, never barks noises, was already potty trained. But I can only guess as she was found straying and no one claimed her at the shelter. 

I have a problem when people consider my dog as public property and act that way. And I guess it has something to do with me as a person. I've lived in big or bigger cities all my life and so it's odd for me to walk up to strangers to have a chat or make random comments. As big cities are generally crowded you don't have much physical space left for you. So it's pretty common to ignore people and not talk to them to respect their privacy. 

I really don't have an issue with people who'd like to pet her. But a) I want to be asked first b) so that I can explain that she doesn't like it. 

BTW I live in Frankfurt, Germany. Maybe people are different here... LOL


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## SarahJG (May 25, 2013)

I hate it too! I want my dogs to be socialised, don't get me wrong, but I want to be the one to control the interaction. To lunge at someone else's dog without asking permission is just plain rude. A couple of weeks ago, I picked Frodo up to take him into a shop: I had him held so he was looking over my shoulder. I suddenly became aware there was someone behind me - this strange man had just come up and was trying to get Frodo to lick his face. Frodo's really friendly - I've trained him that way - but at that moment, I rather wished that he'd snapped! And when I took Florrie to the park for the first time - first time in her harness and on a lead, first time properly outside, AND she was still settling in with me - I had no sooner put her on the grass than a young woman swooped on her and tried to pick her up! She didn't ASK, just said something like 'Ooh how sweet, I want a cuddle'. I told her quite sharply that she couldn't: I'm not having my dogs interfered with by random strangers. But on the other side of the coin, when I took Florrie out the next day, we met a lovely family who waited for me to invite them to approach her, and fed her with treats I gave to them. She enjoyed it, and it was a really good experience for her. So I don't want to shield my chis from everyone, just those who don't treat them (or me) with politeness and respect.


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## coco_little_bear (May 30, 2012)

I usually don't mind it, personally, but I know that Lilo is absolutely fine with being touched by strangers. So I see it as a good way to socialise her and as a compliment to her. hehe If I had a dog that isn't comfortable with strangers then I would most likely find it annoying too though. I do occasionally find it inappropriate if they aren't being gentle or if parents tell their very young kids to approach without asking first.

Actually something that really annoys me and is when people call her. You don't just call a random dog from far and make them run away from their owner. Some morons even call from across the street! Ok the dog is on a leash so won't be crossing, but haven't they thought about this properly and how stupid it is?


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## NinaN (May 13, 2013)

@SarahJG
That is EXACTLY what I mean. I want to control the situation. I'm Pixie's human and I feel obliged to protect her from harm.
I'm not a talkative person when it comes to strangers so I prefer to not get into situations like this myself. 
That incident with that man is downright creepy... Pixie wouldn't have snapped either. This family's behavior was just perfect. I enjoy meeting respectful people that ask and talk to me (!) . Even if it's the same old questions. It makes me happy when people tell me that they didn't know Chis can be so nice and have much better opinion of our little ones, or an elderly lady is all smiles and meeting my Pixie made her day. 

But sometimes I feel like a mobile petting zoo and if people can't pet my dog they make me feel wrong. Or they don't listen if I tell them that petting a sleeping dog can be outright dangerous...


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## coco_little_bear (May 30, 2012)

SarahJG said:


> I suddenly became aware there was someone behind me - this strange man had just come up and was trying to get Frodo to lick his face.


Err, that's a little creepy. I wouldn't like that either!


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## NinaN (May 13, 2013)

coco_little_bear;1548506
Actually something that really annoys me and is when people call her. You don't just call a random dog from far and make them run away from their owner. Some morons even call from across the street! Ok the dog is on a leash so won't be crossing said:


> That happens to me all the time, too. I've tried to tell people how dangerous this is but again, most don't really listen. On one occasion I crossed the path of a mother with her pre-teen daughter who made smooching sounds to get Pixie's attention. I told them not to and why. A few hours later I met them again - guess what they did. Unfortunately I had to get my train. Had I had more time on my hand I would have talked to them.


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## coco_little_bear (May 30, 2012)

NinaN said:


> That happens to me all the time, too. I've tried to tell people how dangerous this is but again, most don't really listen. On one occasion I crossed the path of a mother with her pre-teen daughter who made smooching sounds to get Pixie's attention. I told them not to and why. A few hours later I met them again - guess what they did. Unfortunately I had to get my train. Had I had more time on my hand I would have talked to them.


That's the thing! Even if we explain things to people, they just don't listen/don't care.


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## intent2smile (Dec 4, 2011)

miuccias said:


> Boy, I must be weird! I love when people WANT to touch my pups, I feel so blessed and happy that people like them that much.
> I am never in a rush for anything so I keep stopping when people want to mini play with them no matter what time, it makes me happy!!!!
> I am a strong socialization believer and want to expose my pups to as many people as possible, if it will be ok for only friends and family to touch them, well that will be too little IMO. People have never hold them and always gone to the ground to touch them, I want to clarify that I live in VIENNA - AUSTRIA.
> 
> ...


I don't think you are weird at all. Jaxx gets attention where ever we go and I like when people interact with him because it makes his socialization better. I am like you and have people especially children get down on his level. 
I have just always accepted it as part of owning a small dog. Most people think Jaxx is still a puppy and puppies always get attention. 


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## NinaN (May 13, 2013)

@intent2smile
I'm not against interaction nor do I want to isolate Pixie from people. As I said she is very sweet, seems to be socialized very well so far I can tell (adopted her 3 months ago at age 1 - 2) and I want to it stay like that. I take her everywhere she's allowed to go. Stores of any kind, different cities, public transportation, friends, family, barbecues... she's not shy at all but has a rather reserved character. 
I was going by train yesterday and one of the stops it at Frankfurt Airport - many get off or on here which is rarely an issue. Pixie will look somewhat curious and will curl up soon again. And it can get very packed. I was watching a podcast on my ipod, totally focused on the documentary I was watching and suddenly a hand came into view trying to reach Pixie. That actually startled me.

It's this out of nowhere reaction that is not okay. People staring at me, making funny noises (meowing???), rude comments or people asking the same questions all over again. I can handle that and the latter is even nice I think. People showing interest, respect are by no means what annoys me.


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## LittlePixie (Jan 22, 2013)

I dont like people doing that either. Who knows what kind of germs they have and plus, my Pixie doesnt like strangers at all and yes, she will bite. She is small but still, it hurts and i dont want her getting that upset or hurting anyone. So, I agree 100% with you!


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## coco_little_bear (May 30, 2012)

LittlePixie said:


> Who knows what kind of germs they have


That's one thing I don't like... Living in London, I come across some very stinky dirty characters often... I feel bad telling them to back off so I just let them pet her, but think "OH GOD, I need to wash her after this". Same with sick kids who cough and wipe snot from their nose, then pet her. EEK. A little boy did that the other day and drooled all over her. He was so happy though and his mum was totally oblivious to the snot/drool so I didn't say anything. :lol: I'm a bit germ phobic...


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## SarahJG (May 25, 2013)

I'm not phobic about germs particularly - my philosophy with dogs as well as children is that as 100% protection isn't possible, you might as well expose 'em and let them develop immunity. What offends me is the sense of invasion, and the lack of basic politeness: the failure to check that it's ok before they intrude upon a precious part of your life. (Can't you tell I'm English??)


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## NinaN (May 13, 2013)

SarahJG said:


> What offends me is the sense of invasion, and the lack of basic politeness: the failure to check that it's ok before they intrude upon a precious part of your life. (Can't you tell I'm English??)


That is 100% how I feel and I couldn't have said it better.


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## KrystalLeigh (Aug 17, 2011)

I don't mind when people touch Odie, especially because if she doesn't want to be pet I know she'll move away. However, if she was sitting in my lap and someone came up and pet her without asking, that would be a bit weird. She's so small that it would almost be like petting me. Haha 

Not really concerned with her being disturbed as she is really a people dog and is always excited and alert when there are people around. 


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## asthehind (Jul 5, 2013)

I know just what you mean! Mimi is a very appealing little dog and most people want to pet her or ask questions about her. I don't mind most of the time because most people ask before touching her, but there are some that don't and that annoys me too. I think both of us need to get better at saying 'please don't touch my dog'! Mimi is fine with most of the attention, but unfortunately she tends to attract drunks... She really doesn't like drunks. Neither do I come to that! Whenever children approach I make it an opportunity for them to learn about how to interact with dogs, getting them to let her sniff them first and stroke gently etc.


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## miuccias (Aug 22, 2012)

NinaN said:


> @miuccias
> Oh no, I want to socialize Pixie as much as possible. That's why I take her with me everywhere she's allowed to go. And I have seen big improvements especially when I walk her in the city. She is way more relaxed and follows me without hesitation. She's actually 1 - 2 years old and her previous owner did a very good job in socializing her. As she is fine with dogs of any size, kids, cats (she loves them but they don't love her back. Poor thing), car rides, train rides, never barks noises, was already potty trained. But I can only guess as she was found straying and no one claimed her at the shelter.
> 
> I have a problem when people consider my dog as public property and act that way. And I guess it has something to do with me as a person. I've lived in big or bigger cities all my life and so it's odd for me to walk up to strangers to have a chat or make random comments. As big cities are generally crowded you don't have much physical space left for you. So it's pretty common to ignore people and not talk to them to respect their privacy.
> ...


Nina I just wanted to let you know that what I said is only my point of view, I respect yours and besides that's your dog so if for any reason you don't want anyone touching him/her then nobody should.


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## first_time_chi_owner (Oct 12, 2012)

I don't mind people touching but they have to ask first. If they don't that annoys me. Arnie is timid in front of people he's unsure about and he usually runs between my legs. We went to a pet expo a few weeks ago and were stopped every other step for people to fuss him. I asked every one to do it under the chin and hardly anyone listened, they just bent down and put their hands on top of his head which he doesn't like. A group of about 4-5 7 year old descended upon us and were all patting him, I could tell he was uncomfortable in that situation as he was cowering but it forced them to get between my legs and continue to pet him. I was forced to pick him up in the end. One lady didnt look him in the eye, just sat down beside him and gave him a treat, boy did he want to be her friend!!!! Next time we went past her stall he went running over to her!!!!!

Sorry for the ramble! I don't mind people touching just as long as they ask first and pet him under the chin 


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## NinaN (May 13, 2013)

@miuccias
I'm really sorry if sounded snappy.  Didn't mean to. But some people don't want to understand that some dogs just don't enjoy being petted. One lady even said I shouldn't bring a dog that's uncomfortable around people. Pixie clearly is ok with people otherwise she wouldn't sleep on a crowded train! Some people seem expect a dog that's in public to be there for everyone to pet. 
This attitude combined with not asking beforehand is what makes me mad... and then people complain to be bitten and poor dogs get euthanized. 

@first_time_chi_owner
Oh poor Arnie! Scaring a dog is a red line for me. I can totally relate to this. Those were really mindless people.


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## Ellie-Evie (Mar 24, 2013)

If the person asks me if they can stroke my dog then I am happy to say yes and watch carefully that they are not hurting her and I will answer any questions they have. However, I cannot stand it when people just come straight over and stroke her. Some of them don't even look at me or say a word to me, they just touch her whilst she's in my arms! They also try to get her to lick their hands or their faces, and without sounding too mean, some of them I would rather she didn't lick as they look like they need a good wash! I worry they might have something on their hands that is going to make her ill etc. Also, you hear horror stories about people asking to hold a dog then running off with it.
A man came up to me at the park the other day, after his husky puppy had bounded over and scared the life out of the girls, and his first question was regarding how expensive they are and how much puppies they can have etc. I honestly thought I'd better be safe than sorry and told him they were cheap actually and both have been spayed so can't have puppies so are worthless in the Chihuahua world now. Even though the spaying etc wasn't true, I felt I had to say that as I felt uneasy about his interest in them and worried he might try to take them!
Sorry to go on, but today I took them to a seaside town about half an hour away with my mum and niece and nephew. We sat outside a fish and chip place and a couple came over and went straight for the dogs. I was sitting down and they were standing behind me, so I couldn't see them both as one was over my right shoulder stroking Evie and the other over my left shoulder stroking Mimi. This put me on edge a bit. Then they wanted to give the girls a treat. Now this woman didn't have a dog with her or any bags, so why would she randomly have a dog treat? I know I was probably being over-cautious and paranoid but you hear stories of people giving dogs poison etc. I thought it was completely random to ask to give them a treat as she didn't know me or my dogs so I said no.
My babies are out with me as much as possible, on the lead as well as in my arms, they go in shops, to the park, around the village, around town etc. and most of the time we have good experiences and people are polite and don't make me feel uncomfortable. But with so many dogs being stolen, poisoned, hurt and made scared, I would just rather be on my guard at all times, because if something bad did happen to one of them I'd never forgive myself.
Wow mine is a long post. I think I get the ranting prize....


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## Chihuahuaobsession (Apr 27, 2013)

I like it when people pet my dogs, but mines are not so friendly (specially when I am holding them). Mia will accept it but she doesn't like it. Nina will attack. Bentley the Yorkie is the only one that loves it. Even Jade the puppy hides from strangers. I have taken them to dog parks, pet stores, malls since they were puppies but it seemed to make no difference. I wish my Chihuahuas were friendlier because I take them everywhere and everyone wants to pet them but I kindly let them know that they are not friendly. I think they are angels but I understand if people disagree lol


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## asthehind (Jul 5, 2013)

I had someone try and give my Mimi a treat once. Luckily she is incredibly fussy about treats and won't touch anything (except chicken and ham) while she's out. But I was uncomfortable about it too. :/


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## coco_little_bear (May 30, 2012)

asthehind said:


> I had someone try and give my Mimi a treat once. Luckily she is incredibly fussy about treats and won't touch anything (except chicken and ham) while she's out. But I was uncomfortable about it too. :/


I wouldn't be comfortable with random people giving treats either. With all those stories about people poisoning dogs, who knows what it could contain...


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## Saqqara (Feb 14, 2013)

I don't mind people touching Cai, but he doesn't like strangers. Lucky for him he has a defense mechanism against being touched.
He walks well on a leash but if he is nervous he won't move. So I always have his Outward Hound sling around my body. If I'm in a hurry, I'll put him in the sling. If someone he doesn't know gets too close, he ducks inside like a turtle pulling into its shell. It's the funniest and cutest thing ever. A hand comes toward him and in he goes. its always a hit with people and they realize that he doesn't like being touched. They wind up just "oohing and ahhing" from a distance.


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## Chi Chi Mama (Oct 11, 2012)

I would rather people ask me first, because then I get the chance to tell them that, "the brown one is super friendly and will love for you to pet him, but please, don't touch the black one!!" before they reach down and possibly get nipped by Zero. He really does NOT like strangers and even nipped the neighbour once when he reached down to pet him. Marley LOVES people, and barks at them because he's saying hi, but he loves to be petted. 

I'm afraid that someone won't ask first, then get nipped by Zero as a result, and then I end up having to have him put to sleep if they press charges. That's why I prefer that people ask. Feel free to pet Marley, go for it! Just don't touch Zero, lol!


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