# Jealous



## Dorothy's Mom (Apr 8, 2015)

I admit this sounds so petty and silly but.........

I am a dog-lover. The dogs we have had in our family were here because of ME! Granted hubby and the kids love the dog(s) but it is ME who is the ultimate dog-lover. They are probably, if they had to choose, more like cat people. I also like cats but would choose a dog 100 times over a cat.

Our last dog, Bella, was my heart-dog. We were of one mind, I swear. So when I got Dorothy I was heartbroken and in need of healing. I love Dorothy so much. So, having said all that.........I think Dorothy likes my hubby more than me. And he REALLY likes her, too. I mean, ya, I'm glad Dorothy has many people to love her, but I'm just so accustomed to being THE person to any dog we have ever had. I've always been the one any of our dogs loved the most.

It makes me jealous. There, I said it. And, yes, it's petty!

I keep joking and telling hubby to "get your own dog" but now I'm actually thinking about getting another Chi because I want a dog who loves ME the most!

Has anyone else ever experienced this?


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## SinisterKisses (Sep 20, 2015)

I haven't had this happen personally, all four of ours that we have had have absolutely been MY dogs - they adore my husband of course, but it's very clear who priority #1 is. But, I'm pretty sure I would be crushed if we ever got one in the future who preferred my husband over me. So I think the jealously thing is completely normal. I know my husband feels the same way about them loving me more...he gets jealous now and then.


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## zellko (Jul 3, 2013)

No advice here but I can relate. With both of ours I worried that they might bond more with hubby. Mickey is a family dog, encompassing most of our friends and relatives into his "family" and Piper has eyes only for me. But I just know our next dog will end up being 'his' and I know I wouldn't be happy with that. All the while I'm so happy that hubby loves both dogs so much. Yeah, I feel silly about it, but it's very real.


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## lbwatson (Sep 14, 2012)

Be prepared to get more than just another chi. We got Domino first and she is definitely SOs chi. So I found Gino a year later... he belongs soley to my 12yo dd. Completely they are bffs for sure. I was cautious when getting Pixel but she is with out a doubt my baby. Good thing ky 15yo dd loves her tortoise lol


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## Dorothy's Mom (Apr 8, 2015)

Haha! Canine mental telepathy at play here.......she's now curled up with ME on the couch. I just love her to bits!


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## Lola's mommy8 (Feb 2, 2014)

I would be and have been jealous of similar situations before.


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## Jessicashield (Feb 13, 2015)

I haven't experienced this. Although I think you should get a new puppy, Dorothy would benefit from it too


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## BasketMichele (Sep 9, 2014)

I can really relate to those feelings. I don't think their silly, they are real feelings. Like you, our dogs have always been "mine" so to speak though out the years. When we added Indy to our family and he chose my husband over me, even though I'm always the main care taker, I was very disappointed and also a little jealous too. The only solution for me was I had to add another to the family because part of me felt lost without having "my dog". Along came Carolina and now Carlee and it was the best decision for me. I just feel more complete when my "world" is surrounded by dogs.


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## Wicked Pixie (Oct 14, 2011)

The same thing happened to me. When we first got Delilah she needed a lot of work to get her used to normal doggy life, and it was me who spent a lot of time with her doing all the one on one training she needed.
My daughter and her didn't bond particularly, they could take or leave each other. Delilah bonded to me, her source of safety in a scary world.
After about a year, when Delilah was much more settled and confident she did an about turn for no reason whatsoever. Now she adores my daughter, and would pick her over me in a heartbeat lol.
I think the only answer is to have more Chis than available laps, that way someone is always grateful for some attention


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## Huly (Mar 5, 2012)

My girls love my husband but my boys are mommy's boys! 

We both adore are pups and had a say in all of them


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## manydogz (Oct 10, 2015)

It took a few years for Pearl to heal from her previously abusive and traumatic life. During that time she ignored everyone but me. Now that she's more confident she goes to other people to get a pet and say hello. I must admit to a twinge of jealously even though her eyes stay on me at all times. I guess it's normal. All my dogs prefer to be with me even though it's Johnny who now prepares their food due to my health issues. They love him but hang out with me all day no matter how many "cookies" he feeds them.


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## pinkprincess (Dec 1, 2008)

I felt this when mum and i got patch. He has a lot of anxiety issues and is so bonded with mum. When he is at mine now i have my own place, he will lay on me sometimes but after greeting people he just sticks to mum. It was a good decision to get honey, i still lived with mum (and my sister) at the time and made sure they understood i needed to spend the first few days pretty much on my own with her so i would be her person!


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## coco_little_bear (May 30, 2012)

This has never happened to me, but I think I would feel jealous too in that situation. I'm lucky that our previous chihuahua loved my partner and I equally. Lilo loves us both too, but she definitely has a preference for me and my boyfriend gets a little jealous too. He grabs her and forces her to cuddle with him. :laughing5: However she does love him too, her ideal world is cuddling us both at the same time.  Then when Rocky came along, he also bonded with both of us, but with a preference for my boyfriend (probably because I was already taken by Lilo at all times lol) so he's very happy about that. hehe So maybe getting a second chi is the answer.


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## Dorothy's Mom (Apr 8, 2015)

I posted a reply in the other thread, "questions about multiple chis". Something someone posted there made me think......I think Dorothy picks up on my heart not being 100% percent invested in HER. And the reason for that is because I am still very much mourning for Bella. She passed in Feb and she was my all-time heart-dog. I still can't believe she's gone. We could just communicate without words. And she was so sick the last year of her life (also blind and deaf) and had been insulin-dependent diabetic for years before that. So I did all her caretaking and our bond was so strong. I am still having a hard time letting her go. 

I think Dorothy picks up on this. I am trying really hard these last few days since this all dawned on me, to be more invested in her. I love her so much. It's really hard to explain what I mean about not being "invested" because I DO love and adore her. But some part of my heart still cries for Bella.

I just need to "let go". But it's so hard.


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## Kismet (Jun 18, 2014)

I know how you feel. We have a female Chi x called Satine and despite me doing everything for her she adores my Husband and doesn't give me the time of day. Some days it really grates on me. I don't think you should beat yourself up too much about Dorothy. I can tell just from your posts how much you love her. Maybe she won't be your next heart dog and that's ok, heart dogs are rare and special. She may be a dog that simply has the greatest of lives and is loved beyond measure and that is all any dog could wish for.


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