# I Feel SOOO Guilty !



## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

ok i was planning on getting another dog and i had an idea of trying to raise some money on a certain website , i tried to explain my reasons (im 14 and paying for the dog my self and i do work with my mum and in the next couple months there isent a lot of bookings (my mum is a property manager) and i need just a little help ) i then got some nice suggestions and am trying them , THEN i got someones that made me feel guilty saying pretty much that i shouldnt , now i feel SOOOO guilty now , one of the two main reason for wanting another dog was to "hopefully" help tillie with her anxiety with other animals outsite and i thought if she had someone to go with it would help her and the other reason is the fact i have depression and my animals help me.

so i need to know what you think ? should i or not , i have worked out we can afford it and i can cope im used to responsibility and even though you may see 14 year olds as immature, stroppy teenagers always with there mates , thats not what i am , i actually dont have many friends and the ones i do dont even come to see me and even if i did i would still pick my animals over people ANYDAY so please tell me what you think good or bad also my mum has now said that if im short she will lend me some of the money and i would pay her back so im no longer asking for it so i just need to know if you think i should get another or not?


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## mooberry (Jan 31, 2011)

You set up a chip in account to raise money to pay for the dog because you could not afford it on your own. How are you going to cover medical costs of two dogs? You would have to figure out a way to make more money.

In my mind it's obvious, if you can't afford to pay for the dog then you should just keep loving and spoiling Tillie like you are until you can afford it.

Getting multiple dogs for depression, while they do help I've never heard of a case of adding dogs to make depression better. It's like saying I eat when I'm sad, so I'll have a cake. Then your sad again and you eat another, then sad again and eat another. Dogs alone are not the solution to your problem.

Getting a another dog because Tillie is afraid of dogs won't solve anything either. She will bond with the puppy and still not like other dogs, you have work hard and expose her in a positive way to dogs again and again and again to make her more calm. And she may never be totally happy around other dogs. But you can make her more confident when she meets one.


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

mooberry said:


> You set up a chip in account to raise money to pay for the dog because you could not afford it on your own. How are you going to cover medical costs of two dogs? You would have to figure out a way to make more money.
> 
> In my mind it's obvious, if you can't afford to pay for the dog then you should just keep loving and spoiling Tillie like you are until you can afford it.
> 
> ...


its not the money now as ive worked out i can do it now as i am now getting another job (just got email off a company saying they accept under 16's and will take me on XD) so i think im just feeling guilty and need reasurrence as i can defiantly do it money wise now


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## Chi Nation (Mar 7, 2012)

I know first hand how responsible some teens can be. My nephew is 16 and has been earning his own money since he was thirteen, he saves it, manges it, buys his own cloths, pays for his phone, has saved for a car, and much more. All from mowing lawns and working with my brother who owns a construction company. He is very mature, has been for quite some time. Having a playmate and companion for Tillie is a great thing. She will have another dogs to play and socialize with. 
It can be quite expensive to regularly vet a dog especially if and when they get sick. Take some time to think about it and make sure its something you know for sure you can handle.

I say go for it. I have three, and i dont regret getting either one of them.


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

EastGreenChihuahuas said:


> I know first hand how responsible some teens can be. My nephew is 16 and has been earning his own money since he was thirteen, he saves it, manges it, buys his own cloths, pays for his phone, has saved for a car, and much more. All from mowing lawns and working with my brother who owns a construction company. He is very mature, has been for quite some time. Having a playmate and companion for Tillie is a great thing. She will have another dogs to play and socialize with.
> I say go for it. I have three, and i dont regret getting either one of them.


thank you  its annoying as im constantly told im "not responsibly enough "


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## michele (Jan 12, 2009)

I think for a young person like you to take on 2 jobs ? didn't you say you worked for your mum as well,is too much to take on at your age,why not wait a year,there's no hurry ,you won't have to pay mum back either and if some vets bills crop up you'll have some money to pay for them and i'm sure the breeder will have many more litters in the future.


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## Hollysmom (Nov 26, 2011)

If you want to help Tillie with her anxiety why not enroll her in some classes, join a meetup in your area (or if there isn't one start one), or take her on errands with you? I don't know what is in your area, but there must be some places you can take her to so she can get the exposure she needs.

If you still want a second dog, I say follow your heart.


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

michele said:


> I think for a young person like you to take on 2 jobs ? didn't you say you worked for your mum as well,is too much to take on at your age,why not wait a year,there's no hurry ,you won't have to pay mum back either and if some vets bills crop up you'll have some money to pay for them and i'm sure the breeder will have many more litters in the future.


im not really getting the jobs for the puppy its more because i want to lol i dont know why but ive always wanted to work lol


Hollysmom said:


> If you want to help Tillie with her anxiety why not enroll her in some classes, join a meetup in your area (or if there isn't one start one), or take her on errands with you? I don't know what is in your area, but there must be some places you can take her to so she can get the exposure she needs.
> 
> If you still want a second dog, I say follow your heart.


i am going to try classes with a lady i know (we toke pip to training once when she was ment to be my dog LOL its a lonnnnnng story)
so yeah i will and i would take her everywhere but dunno what the school would say  luckily atm im only going from 9 to half 12 as i have bulling problems so i will have time to take her walking ect.  and yh i think i will


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## Tink (Oct 14, 2009)

I'm one of the ones who made you feel guilty, I believe. All my children are grown, and I have grandchildren just a bit younger than you, so for good or for bad, I'm relating to you more as a mother or grandmother than I am a fellow chi lover. 

If you were my child, I would have serious concerns about you adding another chi. Yes, some of those concerns would be financial, because I know first hand how much it costs to care for even one dog responsibly, let alone two or more. I also know that if you lose any work, the financial burden will fall to your Mom to take care of those animals until you can find something else. Some concerns would be logistical e.g. if you're going to be working two jobs and spending time away from the dogs, who is going to care for them when you can't? If it's your Mom, and she works too, what then? How much time will they be alone? Other concerns include the fact that you are dependent on your Mom for your housing, the roof over your head. It's her house and she may decide after she's lived with the extra dog for a while that she doesn't care for that many dogs and will want you to find it another home....in other words, you are at her mercy. I'm sure she's a good person, I'm not trying to suggest otherwise, but still, it's HER house. You don't have a lot of say because of that. You have limited control of that environment.

I'm not suggesting you're not responsible. But I DO know that even the most responsible of teens (and I had one of those......I also had the most IRRESPONSIBLE of teens, so I've seen both ends of the spectrum) has interests and a life to live outside of caring for animals. My daughter, my responsible one, started volunteering at a Vet's clinic when she was 10. By the time she was 13, she was being paid under the table for her work. By the time she was 16 she was working there full time as their Lead Vet Tech. She was home schooled so she was also studying for her high school diploma at the same time, and spending time with friends, and dealing with the rescued animals she kept bringing home along with her own pets, and keeping up with her chores at home, plus was very focused on her dancing (ballroom dancing, like Dancing With The Stars?) and the expensive competitions and showcases which she paid for with her own money. Trust me, she was VERY responsible. And SHE had trouble keeping up with the animals that were ours, to the point that she ended up doing the responsible thing and re-homing a couple of them because she felt that they simply were not getting the care and attention they deserved. 

I know what I'm talking about. Are you ready for that level of dedication and care for your pets? Can you make the difficult and responsible decision to re-home if it becomes obvious that you just don't have the time/focus/finances/whatever to provide appropriate care for your pets?


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

Tink said:


> I'm one of the ones who made you feel guilty, I believe. All my children are grown, and I have grandchildren just a bit younger than you, so for good or for bad, I'm relating to you more as a mother or grandmother than I am a fellow chi lover.
> 
> If you were my child, I would have serious concerns about you adding another chi. Yes, some of those concerns would be financial, because I know first hand how much it costs to care for even one dog responsibly, let alone two or more. I also know that if you lose any work, the financial burden will fall to your Mom to take care of those animals until you can find something else. Some concerns would be logistical e.g. if you're going to be working two jobs and spending time away from the dogs, who is going to care for them when you can't? If it's your Mom, and she works too, what then? How much time will they be alone? Other concerns include the fact that you are dependent on your Mom for your housing, the roof over your head. It's her house and she may decide after she's lived with the extra dog for a while that she doesn't care for that many dogs and will want you to find it another home....in other words, you are at her mercy. I'm sure she's a good person, I'm not trying to suggest otherwise, but still, it's HER house. You don't have a lot of say because of that. You have limited control of that environment.
> 
> ...


my mum would NEVER kick my out or anything and i will always have a job as i work with my mum and i am able to look after many animals so dont worry  and dont worry about me wanting to go out with mates ect. as i dont have any friends and have no intrest in them any more (ive had many problems , some to do with tillie and them calling her a rat) and i would be working on a sun only and my mums at home most days as most the work is washing ect. and she works most evenings 3 - 6 ish and im at home from half 12 so they are never on their own  i understand your worry i was the same but my mum has reassured me and dont worry she wont kick me out shes not that type of person and she also wants the dog


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## jesuschick (Dec 5, 2010)

I recently posted an article that I thought was helpful. It is about things to consider before adopting a new pet. Here is that link:

What to know before you adopt | TailsInc.com

Hopefully this will help you know and decide.

I am perplexed by feedback on this board sometimes. I suppose I cannot see why on occasion we are ridiculously excited for someone to get a puppy (and tell the person not to listen to anyone who disagrees) and another is told they are not suitable when frankly the ability or inability to manage really sounds identical. 

Only you and your family know if you can manage another dog-from ever angle mentioned in the article. The important thing to always remember is that it is about the dog. They deserve love, exceptional nutrition and outstanding medical care. By taking on any dog, you are signing on and are obligated to provide those things. 

Having money for medical care is a BIG deal. That is something to consider. I will never have patience (nor will I pacify) people who will not medically care for their pet. Perhaps your family is willing to help with those expenses.

I wish you only the best as you decide!


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## Brodysmom (Jan 8, 2009)

I can truly see your side and the wish for another dog. I will accept that you have the money to take care of it and will be responsible for it. My issue would be more in the future.... while NONE of us know what the future will bring, when you are only 14 years old - that is really compounded. We raised two girls (they are in their 20's now) so I completely understand the emotion of them REALLY WANTING something. (And I also understand a parent giving in sometimes when they shouldn't.) However, it's important to remember that a dog is a 15-20 year commitment. It's not the same as wanting a new ipod or a pair of jeans or a trip to the mall. 

Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10? Will you go to college? Will you move out of your parents home and get a job or go to school? Move in with a friend? Getting married? You are at a very volatile age, and the next few years will fly by. Then you won't be just a child living with your parents. You will be an adult and you will have adult responsibilities. If you decide to go to college (and I hope you do), what will happen to your dogs? 

It's really easy to be short sighted when we want something and to think of what is happening now. But being able to plan for the future and maybe deny ourselves something we want now and put it off until later, when the timing is right, is part of being a grown up. 

Perhaps you have plans to just stay at home for the next 10 years and live with your parents. Or maybe your mom is perfectly fine with having a couple of dogs to care for after you move out on your own. It's hard to know what anyone's situation is like. I just think it's important to remember and to acknowledge that owning a dog is a 15+ year commitment.


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## pastel (Jan 12, 2012)

Hi theshanman97,
In terms of maturity, I can't picture you as one of those boycrazy teens chasing after whatever teen they chase after nowadays. (man, I feel old)
As much as I think you're a really responsible, mature person, I would really consider what brody'smom has said, about where you can see your life in 15 years.

Also, financially, I would wait to get a dog until you save about $1k extra for unforeseen events!

For example, I had a $1k extra "vet funds" for Nike for her first year, which was supposed to include fixing and her shots. The first month, she ended up having UTI. The next month, she apparently got into something and was drooling and foaming at the mouth, which took us to the vet again! Anyway, after those two vet visits, then her shots, the 1k extra funds was all gone before her spaying so we had to cut into our own funds for that. She's still under a year LoL.

I guess what I'm saying is, 1 times out of a 100, you'll get the odd puppy who's just not doing well, and the last thing on your mind is returning the puppy to the breeder!

Also, I can totally understand you wanting another puppy! I've been there!!! As long as you have thought things through and you're honest with yourself, I would go for it!


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

jesuschick said:


> I recently posted an article that I thought was helpful. It is about things to consider before adopting a new pet. Here is that link:
> 
> What to know before you adopt | TailsInc.com
> 
> ...


Thanks  i will now read it  x


Brodysmom said:


> I can truly see your side and the wish for another dog. I will accept that you have the money to take care of it and will be responsible for it. My issue would be more in the future.... while NONE of us know what the future will bring, when you are only 14 years old - that is really compounded. We raised two girls (they are in their 20's now) so I completely understand the emotion of them REALLY WANTING something. (And I also understand a parent giving in sometimes when they shouldn't.) However, it's important to remember that a dog is a 15-20 year commitment. It's not the same as wanting a new ipod or a pair of jeans or a trip to the mall.
> 
> Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10? Will you go to college? Will you move out of your parents home and get a job or go to school? Move in with a friend? Getting married? You are at a very volatile age, and the next few years will fly by. Then you won't be just a child living with your parents. You will be an adult and you will have adult responsibilities. If you decide to go to college (and I hope you do), what will happen to your dogs?
> 
> ...


well my plan is to go to college which is 30 mins away so i will still be at home and then go to a local uni and i then can also stay at home and then im planning on doing work (hopefully) at a local radio station and if/when i get my own house the dogs will come with me  ive planned everything but i know it could go wrong or a may get offered a job in london ect. but still the dogs wil always come with me  


pastel said:


> Hi theshanman97,
> In terms of maturity, I can't picture you as one of those boycrazy teens chasing after whatever teen they chase after nowadays. (man, I feel old)
> As much as I think you're a really responsible, mature person, I would really consider what brody'smom has said, about where you can see your life in 15 years.
> 
> ...


yh i do understand what everyone is saying , when i first though about it i just told my self i was stupid lol but i have figured it out and as far as i know i can also im gonna be getting pet insurance which will be 6 pound a month and cover ALOT so that will cover the most of it  but thank you for everyone's concern


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## Reese and Miley (Jun 24, 2010)

What I was going to say is very similar to the advice Tracy already gave. I was having the same thoughts about looking down the road to the future, luckily for us chis are a long-lifed breed! I'm in my 20s and just finishing up my last semester of college, so my thoughts immediately went to what will happen when you're at that stage in your life and have two dogs to provide for. Just some things to consider, but what if in the future you get a great opportunity to go away to school, you won't be able to have pets in student housing, and living in a dorm your first year i think is a really important way to get involved in the whole school experience and meet a lot of different people. You (and I mean anyone, not just because you are a young teen) might think you have all of your plans made and set and in the future might want to make different choices. Having two dogs will really limit your choices. I'm an absolute animal lover myself, that's why I have three chis in addition to my husbands lab. If I didn't have to consider anyone else's feelings, I'd probably have more  I too chose to have pets during college, and while I made it work and I'm sure you could too, it really limited my choices. There were study abroad opportuinities in Greece and Thailand that I wanted to sign up for but couldn't. Many of my friends from high school and college had amazing experiences doing study abroad programs all over the world. They had incredible experiences and were always posting amazing pictures of ruins in Chile etc to Facebook that I drooled over. Having pets limited my housing options as well, you will make friends and opportunities you don't forsee come up to get an apartment with friends etc you may miss out on bc some don't want dogs or the apartment everyone else likes doesn't allow them, etc. Another opportunity that I missed out on was during my sophomore year when my older sister had a baby. She lives very far away from me in Canada. We have always been close but never see each other as much as we would like, maybe twice a year. After she had my niece and had to return to work she asked me to come and live with her family for the year, taking care of my first niece when I wasn't at school and spending that time with her family. Her husband is allergic to animals, so going meant leaving my own pets behind. For that reason alone I didn't go. I missed out on the experience of spending that first year with my niece and getting to be so close to my sister all the time who I love and miss everyday. My niece has grown up so quickly and is now starting school, it's an opportunity I lost out on that I can never get back. I have a wonderful relationship with my niece, but rarely get to see her and often feel like I'm missing out not getting one more involved in her life. Those are just a few examples from my own experience. Having two dogs will tie you down and limit your future options in ways you can't even think of now. If you can afford it and you have your moms permission than it is entirely up to you whether you add a new pet, but as much as animals bring to our lives they can also tie us down. Keep in mind that you are making a decision that will shape your life for the next 15-20 years, and getting a second dog WILL retrict you in the future and limit your choices. Just something to think about from my own experience!


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## pupluv168 (Mar 7, 2012)

Hello. I just thought I would add my experience. I got a Chihuahua when I was sixteen. We had it all figured out- he was going to go to school with me, I was going to get an apartment, and he was going to be with me forever. Anyhow, to make a long story short- none of that happened. He ended up at home with my parents and he is now their baby. While it worked out okay (my parents have taken him in and he adores them), it could have been much worse.

Now, at 22 years old, I am beginning law school in August. After over a year of careful planning and saving, I got another Chihuahua. I made sure that the apartment complexes in the city I am moving to for law school allow dogs, saved over $1000, and made sure that I had budgeted for monthly expenses. 

I'm not trying to sway you one way or another, but it sounds like you are looking at another dog to fill a void in yourself. A dog will not do that and they require a TON of work and money. I just wanted to share what happened when I made a similar decision 6 years ago. Good luck!


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## proudpeyotemama (Feb 20, 2012)

We decided to get a second dog to help socialize Ote, and so far it has been a very good decision. I am eighteen, have my own job, live on my own and do not "live off my parents" and can still afford vet bills for both pups along with supplies and a little extra for "spoiling." I think you can do it! I'd still enroll in the classes as suggested. Might be good for her!


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## Wawies (Jan 23, 2012)

I think if you can afford it, you should totally go for it. Dogs always help me when it comes 2 depression, vet bills can be expensive but if u have the money for it why not get another? I could not live my life with out dogs, so imo go for it! just keep being as responsible as u are and you will be fine!


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## LostLakeLua (Sep 6, 2009)

I'll be one of the minority who says go for it. You at least seem to have a backup as you said your mom wants it as well' and if she is being supportive and is a responsible adult she wouldn't let you go through with it. I mean I don't know your mom and it may not be like that, but if it's the case, and SHE trusts you, I'd go for it. But I'd suggest (and you'll likely need your mom to be the one to do all paperwork) if she's up for the commitment also; to save one from a shelter or rescue. Maybe even an older adult that has less energy requirements but needs a place to stay and be loved. Obedience classes are tons of fun with older dogs (and you CAN teach them new tricks LOL) as it's fun to see how they just bloom!


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

Reese and Miley said:


> What I was going to say is very similar to the advice Tracy already gave. I was having the same thoughts about looking down the road to the future, luckily for us chis are a long-lifed breed! I'm in my 20s and just finishing up my last semester of college, so my thoughts immediately went to what will happen when you're at that stage in your life and have two dogs to provide for. Just some things to consider, but what if in the future you get a great opportunity to go away to school, you won't be able to have pets in student housing, and living in a dorm your first year i think is a really important way to get involved in the whole school experience and meet a lot of different people. You (and I mean anyone, not just because you are a young teen) might think you have all of your plans made and set and in the future might want to make different choices. Having two dogs will really limit your choices. I'm an absolute animal lover myself, that's why I have three chis in addition to my husbands lab. If I didn't have to consider anyone else's feelings, I'd probably have more  I too chose to have pets during college, and while I made it work and I'm sure you could too, it really limited my choices. There were study abroad opportuinities in Greece and Thailand that I wanted to sign up for but couldn't. Many of my friends from high school and college had amazing experiences doing study abroad programs all over the world. They had incredible experiences and were always posting amazing pictures of ruins in Chile etc to Facebook that I drooled over. Having pets limited my housing options as well, you will make friends and opportunities you don't forsee come up to get an apartment with friends etc you may miss out on bc some don't want dogs or the apartment everyone else likes doesn't allow them, etc. Another opportunity that I missed out on was during my sophomore year when my older sister had a baby. She lives very far away from me in Canada. We have always been close but never see each other as much as we would like, maybe twice a year. After she had my niece and had to return to work she asked me to come and live with her family for the year, taking care of my first niece when I wasn't at school and spending that time with her family. Her husband is allergic to animals, so going meant leaving my own pets behind. For that reason alone I didn't go. I missed out on the experience of spending that first year with my niece and getting to be so close to my sister all the time who I love and miss everyday. My niece has grown up so quickly and is now starting school, it's an opportunity I lost out on that I can never get back. I have a wonderful relationship with my niece, but rarely get to see her and often feel like I'm missing out not getting one more involved in her life. Those are just a few examples from my own experience. Having two dogs will tie you down and limit your future options in ways you can't even think of now. If you can afford it and you have your moms permission than it is entirely up to you whether you add a new pet, but as much as animals bring to our lives they can also tie us down. Keep in mind that you are making a decision that will shape your life for the next 15-20 years, and getting a second dog WILL retrict you in the future and limit your choices. Just something to think about from my own experience!


i understand what everyone is saying but i dont need to go away for uni ect, and around here we dont have trips away ect. and im planning on being a radio producer i hoping locally but if i ever get offered a job say in London i have already checked and 70% of houses in London except dogs luckily  ,also my uni time will only be 2 years and im planning to take a gap year after college to gain more work experience at local radio and my mum isn't one of them mothers who kick out there children at a certain age , my mum said i can stay as long as i want as apparently its technically my house (also there's no way we can be "kicked out" ect. as we own the house outright and so we don't have mortgage ect. ) so thats ok and my mum said i can always come back home , i know things can go wrong and im prepared for that i also have some money saved up from work ect. so i will hopefully be ok i think im going to work more things out atm and then decide  


pupluv168 said:


> Hello. I just thought I would add my experience. I got a Chihuahua when I was sixteen. We had it all figured out- he was going to go to school with me, I was going to get an apartment, and he was going to be with me forever. Anyhow, to make a long story short- none of that happened. He ended up at home with my parents and he is now their baby. While it worked out okay (my parents have taken him in and he adores them), it could have been much worse.
> 
> Now, at 22 years old, I am beginning law school in August. After over a year of careful planning and saving, I got another Chihuahua. I made sure that the apartment complexes in the city I am moving to for law school allow dogs, saved over $1000, and made sure that I had budgeted for monthly expenses.
> 
> I'm not trying to sway you one way or another, but it sounds like you are looking at another dog to fill a void in yourself. A dog will not do that and they require a TON of work and money. I just wanted to share what happened when I made a similar decision 6 years ago. Good luck!


i understand its not just to do that its also because of once in my life i want to have something i just WANT not NEED as well see , i needed tillie , i needed something to love and something to love me and i understand what EVRYONE thinks of teens that they are annoying kids wanting everything ,well im not like that , i have never asked for anything in my life except this , if everyone knew what my life was like you would e shocked ive tbh not had the best life ut im back on track now and i can do it , i know i can as this is all ive ever wanted is animals , im gonna be honest im not even bothered about jobs ect. all ive wanted tbh is a family and animals , ik in this day of age it sounds stupid and im ashamed in a way to tell anyone but thats what i want , i know i need a job so thats why i will do it , and i will make sure the dogs have everything even if i have to starve i dont care i will make sure they are looked after


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

proudpeyotemama said:


> We decided to get a second dog to help socialize Ote, and so far it has been a very good decision. I am eighteen, have my own job, live on my own and do not "live off my parents" and can still afford vet bills for both pups along with supplies and a little extra for "spoiling." I think you can do it! I'd still enroll in the classes as suggested. Might be good for her!


thank you! and im glad someone understands i can do it and yh i am going to take her to classes , my mum is going to ring the lady we used when training pippi (she also needs training atm shes started copying tillie ) so i hoping that will help  x


Wawies said:


> I think if you can afford it, you should totally go for it. Dogs always help me when it comes 2 depression, vet bills can be expensive but if u have the money for it why not get another? I could not live my life with out dogs, so imo go for it! just keep being as responsible as u are and you will be fine!


thank you! also im not sure if you have it where u are but here we can get pet insurance (ik that something people are saying to do with vet bils) and the one i will be getting is 6 pounds a month and it covers ALL vet bills so we should be fine  thank you for making me feel better  x


KittynKahlua said:


> I'll be one of the minority who says go for it. You at least seem to have a backup as you said your mom wants it as well' and if she is being supportive and is a responsible adult she wouldn't let you go through with it. I mean I don't know your mom and it may not be like that, but if it's the case, and SHE trusts you, I'd go for it. But I'd suggest (and you'll likely need your mom to be the one to do all paperwork) if she's up for the commitment also; to save one from a shelter or rescue. Maybe even an older adult that has less energy requirements but needs a place to stay and be loved. Obedience classes are tons of fun with older dogs (and you CAN teach them new tricks LOL) as it's fun to see how they just bloom!


i was thinking of getting one from a shelter but the ones here only have 6 plus year old once and dont get me wrong i would get one but with pippi (our older 5 year collie) i dont know how she would react to an older dog but i will do some research about it  x


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## Poppys mummy (May 29, 2011)

My sister had a dog before she left home (she was about your age then) and my parents always had the understanding that they would have him if she left home as he was their dog's litter mate and they were bonded. There wasn't any kerfuffle involved, it was just always the case. I'm sure your mum is responsible enough to understand that one day you may fly the nest and that Tilly (and possibly another dog) will likely not be able to go with you.

I think outside socialisation is the key to helping your pup. I take Poppy to doggie daycare two days a week and she's confident now with all dogs, large or small whereas before she was very submissive. 

I was so sorry to hear about your bullying issues at school. My daughter, now in her 20's had similar issues. She is now a beautiful, mature and successful young woman on the other side of the nastiness  I wish the same for you. 

PS: I tried to add you on FB but couldn't send you a message. I'd love for you to be in touch with my daughter, I think she could give you hope and sound advice, bless you. xx


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## AussieLass (Mar 1, 2012)

Ah yes, Lynda has raised a very good point about the abilitiy to take dogs with you when you leave home or life changes - we none of us know what's in store.

After my daughter wore me down (she was 16) I gave in and got a Male Mastiff the same age as our juvenile Mastiff bitch that was considered her dog albeit it was really a family dog. The bond that grew between these two pups was like something I'd never seen - even when I used to take them to the dog park, no other dogs existed for them, they just played and wrestled with each other ignoring all the others present from when they were little, right through until 2-3 years when I stopped taking them - same at the dog beach, they only have eyes for each other.

She chose to move out with her fiance when she was 19yo and I absolutely refused to allow her to take Boof - one, because she was completely irresponsible with his feeding, watering, care and maintenance, two because he would suddenly be left alone by himself all day and night, possibly tied up, whilst they worked and partied and, three, because it would've broken both his and Jessie's hearts to be separated, and I could not bear the thought of dogs suffering because of her selfishness.

My daughter could not see any of this and hated me for it - threatened to take me to court, go to the police, all sorts of things. As hard as it was, I stood my ground and told her to do whatever she felt she needed to, but there was no way on God's green earth she was taking that dog. We've not spoken a word to each other in over 2 years because of it yet we were so very close before. Funny thing is, she split with her fiance & he took their new dog, she got a new boyfriend, spent another few thousand on another dog, and if she splits with him, it'll also go with him. 

Life changes so much when you are young - she left school and became the very feminine Manager of a branch of a Building Society Bank at 19yo. Then she up and started driving huge 100 ton quarry trucks and earns a small fortune. Apparently she now intends to go away driving massive big mining trucks - she wouldn't be able to take a dog with her there either as they live on site. So, I lost a daughter to a grubby fiance and a dog, but would do it all over again if I had to - I live in hope that one day she'll understand.

All I'm saying is that life unfolds in ways we least expect it to, and to take a dog away from it's loved one/s (it's canine pack) to live alone with someone who's away day and night is really NOT fair. 

You'll come through your depression, bullying etc and go on to have a wonderful life, just as Lynda's and my daughter did (she's now the living envy of everyone who ever gave her hell whilst they're still wallowing around in their own unfulfilled, pathetic little lives of boys, unwanted pregnancies, partying, recreational drugs, binge drinking, bitching & gossiping).


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## BaileysMum (Nov 2, 2011)

I agree with pretty much everything that was said - go for it if you can afford it and your mom is okay with it. 

I just want to caution you - vet bills can sneak up very fast, I should know I've just been through it. In less than 24 hours I've spent close to 2 grand on vet care and medications. Now I am not telling you this to try and talk you out of getting a second one, but just know that it can happen and does happen so just have a plan for a just in case senario


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## Christabelle (Dec 21, 2011)

I just want to add, I have a dog that suffers from anxiety on
many different levels. Introducing another dog is NOT a cure
for those issues.

I keep seeing people who want to add another dog to make
their first dog better. It doesn't work that way. Dog's do not
automatically become more social or less stressed or more healthy
because you introduce a new pet. 

Don't feel guilty! You are like most of us, we would love to have
a full house of little Chi's running around. Just make sure it's going
to be the best situation all around and please don't get a dog out
of thinking it's going to cure all of Tillie's issues. Personally, I say
invest your money in making her better first.


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

Poppys mummy said:


> My sister had a dog before she left home (she was about your age then) and my parents always had the understanding that they would have him if she left home as he was their dog's litter mate and they were bonded. There wasn't any kerfuffle involved, it was just always the case. I'm sure your mum is responsible enough to understand that one day you may fly the nest and that Tilly (and possibly another dog) will likely not be able to go with you.
> 
> I think outside socialisation is the key to helping your pup. I take Poppy to doggie daycare two days a week and she's confident now with all dogs, large or small whereas before she was very submissive.
> 
> ...


i will NEVER go anywhere without my animals i dont care what it is i will 100% not i dont think ANY of you are understanding that im not that type of person! , i would give up my dream dog for my animals and im thinking of only working localy anyway and i wont have to move or anything and try adding me on fb again 


AussieLass said:


> Ah yes, Lynda has raised a very good point about the abilitiy to take dogs with you when you leave home or life changes - we none of us know what's in store.
> 
> After my daughter wore me down (she was 16) I gave in and got a Male Mastiff the same age as our juvenile Mastiff bitch that was considered her dog albeit it was really a family dog. The bond that grew between these two pups was like something I'd never seen - even when I used to take them to the dog park, no other dogs existed for them, they just played and wrestled with each other ignoring all the others present from when they were little, right through until 2-3 years when I stopped taking them - same at the dog beach, they only have eyes for each other.
> 
> ...


i would like to say this as ive had ALOT of grive about this but i am not a normal 14 year old im WAY more responsibal and i would never leave my dogs and i will always have some where to go my mum will always let me come home and os will my other family members and i am planning on working localy so i dont have to move a way ect. and i in no circumstances even if i get a boyfriend and he dont like them then simply i will get rid of him , men are nothing compared to dogs and theres nothing that would make me leave them with someone else i would live on the streets (which i never will have to) to be with my dogs! and also i havent "begged " my mum i never have asked begged her for anything all i said was "tillies breeder is going to maybe have some more uppies and i was think i may get one if i have saved the work money and know i can do it" and so said "ig you think you can do it then im fine with it" and now shes excited and some people have said "what if you want to go out with your mates?" the thing is i dont! i prefere spending time with my dogs i have turned down a holiday to wales to watch a band because that weekend i was taking tillie to penrose ect. and i didnt care! because it was the best week i had! so please dont worrry my dogs make me happy  


BaileysMum said:


> I agree with pretty much everything that was said - go for it if you can afford it and your mom is okay with it.
> 
> I just want to caution you - vet bills can sneak up very fast, I should know I've just been through it. In less than 24 hours I've spent close to 2 grand on vet care and medications. Now I am not telling you this to try and talk you out of getting a second one, but just know that it can happen and does happen so just have a plan for a just in case senario


i fo know about vet bills LOL we had it before but ive cheaked before getting tillie the insurance i can get and it covers up to 1 million pounds on vet bills ect. and it covers emergencies and anything so i know its covered any we have a small fund in an account if something went wrong


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

Christabelle said:


> I just want to add, I have a dog that suffers from anxiety on
> many different levels. Introducing another dog is NOT a cure
> for those issues.
> 
> ...


thank you i have found out off a trainer that it wont help but not make it worse either and im now getting her training classes in a group to get her more confidence and to help her and thats only 2 pound a week! XD so i have decided if she isent better by the time the puppy is born then i wont get another yet and also if tillie dosent like the puppies when we go to see them then im not either


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## Angel1210 (Mar 14, 2011)

I agree with Karen, just because you can afford to buy another dog doesn't mean you should get one. Circumstances can turn around in a minute!!

Besides, I saw a different problem here. I read that one reason he wanted another dog was because of his depression! I think the real problem, the deeper one is to get to the reason for his depression. I can't imagine getting another dog curing it! I am sure that you are very mature for your age. And I know that any of us could have our lives changed in an instant! But, where you are only 14, I think you should spend more time and effort with Tillie, teaching her different things. I'll bet she's capable of all kinds of tricks! 

I think you really need to get to the root of your depression! You are awfully young to be plaqued with depression!! It pains me to see someone with "chronic depression." I am very fortunate, I have gone through my spells, but without my husband, I hate to think how I would have turned out! 

I wish you all the best, but please try to figure out what is causing your depression and try to work on it. It isn't easy!! But, you have a long life ahead of you and I can't imagine it "just going away." (the depression that is)


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## Christabelle (Dec 21, 2011)

theshanman97 said:


> thank you i have found out off a trainer that it wont help but not make it worse either and im now getting her training classes in a group to get her more confidence and to help her and thats only 2 pound a week! XD so i have decided if she isent better by the time the puppy is born then i wont get another yet and also if tillie dosent like the puppies when we go to see them then im not either


:love7: :love7:

So smart! I would love to know how the classes go!


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

Angel1210 said:


> I agree with Karen, just because you can afford to buy another dog doesn't mean you should get one. Circumstances can turn around in a minute!!
> 
> Besides, I saw a different problem here. I read that one reason he wanted another dog was because of his depression! I think the real problem, the deeper one is to get to the reason for his depression. I can't imagine getting another dog curing it! I am sure that you are very mature for your age. And I know that any of us could have our lives changed in an instant! But, where you are only 14, I think you should spend more time and effort with Tillie, teaching her different things. I'll bet she's capable of all kinds of tricks!
> 
> ...


ik the reason for my depression and i have no way of getting rid of it as im not alowed to have consiling as im "apparently" not old enough or have enough reason too! i would think lossing a parent at 2 is quiet a big reason! but im working on it and getting there  


Christabelle said:


> :love7: :love7:
> 
> So smart! I would love to know how the classes go!


i will! i will take some photos and do a post when i get the lessons started


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## lilxkrystal (Feb 26, 2012)

Brodysmom said:


> I can truly see your side and the wish for another dog. I will accept that you have the money to take care of it and will be responsible for it. My issue would be more in the future.... while NONE of us know what the future will bring, when you are only 14 years old - that is really compounded. We raised two girls (they are in their 20's now) so I completely understand the emotion of them REALLY WANTING something. (And I also understand a parent giving in sometimes when they shouldn't.) However, it's important to remember that a dog is a 15-20 year commitment. It's not the same as wanting a new ipod or a pair of jeans or a trip to the mall.
> 
> Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10? Will you go to college? Will you move out of your parents home and get a job or go to school? Move in with a friend? Getting married? You are at a very volatile age, and the next few years will fly by. Then you won't be just a child living with your parents. You will be an adult and you will have adult responsibilities. If you decide to go to college (and I hope you do), what will happen to your dogs?
> 
> ...


This is a very good point!
My male cousin who was 13, He had hardly any friends and was bullied in school (sounds very similar to the thread maker) he got a female Jack Russell. Which was healthy and a great little dog. At age 16 he decided he needed a staffy to keep it company(he ended up getting a male). He worked and was thought to be very responsible for his age etc eventually the dogs reproduced and the Jack Russell had a litter of 3 puppies. My cousin could only give away one of the puppies. So he was stuck with 4 hyper dogs. Due to the violent nature of staffyness in them, the puppies and mum were inside dogs and the staffy dad lived out side. One day the smallest puppy (she was a few years old at this stage) got out into the yard and got in a fight with the father staffy. He ended up killing her. It was such a sad time for our family. A few minor things that could of been avoided if my cousin had put more thought into it. de-sexing etc 

Then he turned 18 got a girlfriend started going clubbing etc so the dogs weren't getting all the attention they needed. Then when he got sick of living with his dad and they needed to move out of home it was so hard for him cause he had 3 dogs. 1 that always needed to be separated from the other two. He still has the orginal jack russle and her pup but unfortunately he had to re-home the staffy as it was unsafe for the other 2 dogs

My point of my story is you never know what will happen in the future especially at such a young age.

I'm would love to get a play mate for Bandit but It is such a *big* commitment. I'm 23 I work and have regular income, My partner does shift work so the pooches would hardly ever be alone. But you need to think about every little issue that will arise with a new puppy.
* What happens if you get a stubborn little pup who won't potty train.
*What happens if you don't get the pup enough socialisation then you will have another dog who doesn't like other dogs. Which makes it hard to take them on walks or to the beach.
*What happens if one or both of the chi's get sick and you have to fork out 2000 or even 4000 to get them fixed up? I have a credit card sitting there for emergencies do you have access to that kind of money?
*What happens when or if you go to college? 
*What happens when you 18-20's and you meet the love of your life and he wants to move out and all you can afford is an apartment? or as you said above Tillie isn't your dog so when you move out will you be separating them? Cause that's not right either.
*You won't be able to go travelling for long amounts of time? So if you ever wanted to backpack or do a working holiday that wont be a possibility.

There is so much to take into account remember it is a long long long term commitment.


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

lilxkrystal said:


> This is a very good point!
> My male cousin who was 13, He had hardly any friends and was bullied in school (sounds very similar to the thread maker) he got a female Jack Russell. Which was healthy and a great little dog. At age 16 he decided he needed a staffy to keep it company(he ended up getting a male). He worked and was thought to be very responsible for his age etc eventually the dogs reproduced and the Jack Russell had a litter of 3 puppies. My cousin could only give away one of the puppies. So he was stuck with 4 hyper dogs. Due to the violent nature of staffyness in them, the puppies and mum were inside dogs and the staffy dad lived out side. One day the smallest puppy (she was a few years old at this stage) got out into the yard and got in a fight with the father staffy. He ended up killing her. It was such a sad time for our family. A few minor things that could of been avoided if my cousin had put more thought into it. de-sexing etc
> 
> Then he turned 18 got a girlfriend started going clubbing etc so the dogs weren't getting all the attention they needed. Then when he got sick of living with his dad and they needed to move out of home it was so hard for him cause he had 3 dogs. 1 that always needed to be separated from the other two. He still has the orginal jack russle and her pup but unfortunately he had to re-home the staffy as it was unsafe for the other 2 dogs
> ...


i do know lol i understand everyone concerns but for one pippi (our collie) is soppy and even scared of tillie! , i also dont agree with clubbing i think its disgusting what goes on so that will never happen , what i said earlier that my dogs will remain my priority is true no matter what happens in my life they will come first over jobs , boy friends , friends or anything! as tillie is the only thing that is atm keeping me on this earth , also tillie is my dog and pippi isent and i am planning on getting a house near my mum so they would see each other each dat , also im going to a local college as i have no choose in going as the goverment have made it the law and i will not have to move as i have said before and its the same for uni , also i dont like holidays , i hate airoplanes ect. and have no reason to go on holiday when i live some where so beautiful , if some "man" wants to move out then i will not go as its stupid at that age and i would never leave my dogs anyway in no circumstances and with vet bills , as ive said 10 TIMES! im getting pet insurance which covers EVERYTHING its not like im stupid and have researched you know!!!???? i may be 14 but not stupid!!!! im sorry but ive had enough of reply to different people with the same questions!


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## lilxkrystal (Feb 26, 2012)

theshanman97 said:


> i do know lol i understand everyone concerns but for one pippi (our collie) is soppy and even scared of tillie! , i also dont agree with clubbing i think its disgusting what goes on so that will never happen , what i said earlier that my dogs will remain my priority is true no matter what happens in my life they will come first over jobs , boy friends , friends or anything! as tillie is the only thing that is atm keeping me on this earth , also tillie is my dog and pippi isent and i am planning on getting a house near my mum so they would see each other each dat , also im going to a local college as i have no choose in going as the goverment have made it the law and i will not have to move as i have said before and its the same for uni , also i dont like holidays , i hate airoplanes ect. and have no reason to go on holiday when i live some where so beautiful , if some "man" wants to move out then i will not go as its stupid at that age and i would never leave my dogs anyway in no circumstances and with vet bills , as ive said 10 TIMES! im getting pet insurance which covers EVERYTHING its not like im stupid and have researched you know!!!???? i may be 14 but not stupid!!!! im sorry but ive had enough of reply to different people with the same questions!




From that post alone shows me how young you really are.
You have no idea what's in store and nothing goes the way we plan. At this point in your life you are depressed what happens when you get better? 

Of course you don't agree with clubbing and partying yet... Your so young once you find people you enjoy being around your whole perspective will change.

Maybe it's different from where you're from but 18-20's isn't to young to move out in Sydney? I moved out at 19 but I am very independent. Which is kind of saying if your not independent enough to look after your self should you really be taking on the responsibility of another animal? 

What happens if you are unable to get a house close to your mum's? Splitting up the dogs would be so unfair. 

You say your dogs will remain your 1st priority over anything even work/college. Think of this situation your chi is really sick and she needs super vision for the whole week? As you said above you don't really have any friends. You mum has to earn a living. Are you really going to ring up your work and say you need a week off to look after your dog? You will be fired then you wont be able to afford to feed it or pay your pet insurance premium? 

1 dog is enough in my opinion. I feel there should be a age limit to actually own your puppy.

I don't mean to be rude or mean but just pointing out the facts


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

lilxkrystal said:


> From that post alone shows me how young you really are.
> You have no idea what's in store and nothing goes the way we plan. At this point in your life you are depressed what happens when you get better?
> 
> Of course you don't agree with clubbing and partying yet... Your so young once you find people you enjoy being around your whole perspective will change.
> ...


im sorry about my outburst earlier but i am not in a good place to do and im sorry but you have deeply offended me! How dare you say there should be an age limit? i can look after my dogs as good as anyone INCLUDING you! i dont agree with clubbing as in the UK it involves drugs ect. and im 100% against that!
and i didnt mean its young to move out at 18-20 i ment with a partner ect. as some men are not grown up here and just sit on there *** all day, all my mum said i can live here as long as i have to and i live in a village/town and theres ALWAYS summin for sale! and the comment that i dont think theres anything in my way is 100% WRONG! i am just saying what i can do and my plans and I AM NOT TOO YOUNG!!!!! IM A HELL OF ALOT MY GROWN UP THAN MOST PEOPLE MY AGE! I WORK , LOOK AFTER MY ANIMALS, GO SCHOOL AND COPE WITH MY MUMS ILLNESS!!! YOU TRY IT???!!!! no offence but i dont think its your place to say when someones too yonge to have an animal.


TBH IVE HAD IT WITH THIS SITE AND MAY LEAVE NOW! I HAVE MADE NICE FRIENDS BUT THEIR IS A COUPLE NASTY PEOPLE RUINING THIS SITE FOR ME!

*I REMOVE THEESE COMMENTS AND I SEND APOLOGYS TO YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE :'( IM VERY SORRY IM JUST A PROPER MESS TODAY IVE HAD SOME BAD NEWS AND BEEN TAKING IT OUT ON EVERYONE :'( *


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## theshanman97 (Feb 19, 2012)

I would like to apology to people i have been really mean to its just today im not in a good place i am very sorry!


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## michele (Jan 12, 2009)

Shannon you came here for advise,and i'm sorry some people have been rude to you and upset you,you're a real sweetie and for your age i think you are very grown up and mature


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