# I am a failiure!



## Iamafairy (Jan 26, 2005)

I should be dead wait I'd rather be dead. Tonight I went to a party that I had been planing for a while. It clashed with a do my mum was going to problem was we didn't tell each other till today. Niether of us could really back out so we both went we gave the dogs a walk plenty of toys and food ect and they we left 3 hours or so. I just got back and my mum confronts me crying saying our neighbours on the left were going to get the council on us because the dogs were barking. As its only me and my mum the male came and really confronted her she felt very uneasy. Shes now saying we have to get rid of the dogs. I don't know what to do. Im scared beyond belief. Please someone help me im desperate. love zoe


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## Tyson (Jan 14, 2005)

what if you just went over and talked/negotiated with the neighbor? Just tell them that you apologize and that it wont happen again.


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## ilovesadie (Jun 1, 2004)

I don't think they can make you get rid of your dogs just based on that one incident. Are your dogs outside? If not, then I don't see how they can disturb the neighbors that much. I don't know the laws in your area but it really seems unreasonable to make you give away your dogs without even a warning. I would just go talk to them like Tyson said. Hopefully you can make things right.


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## Tyson (Jan 14, 2005)

From the post (im just guessing) i think she might live in an apartment type location with the neighbors next door. If not and it's your own house im pretty sure the neighbors cant do a thing about it.


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## LuvMyChiwawas (Sep 1, 2005)

OMG I'm so sorry. I don't know what to tell you to do in this situation.


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## nikki&paris (May 30, 2005)

I'm so sorry this happened. I would try talking to them and reassuring them it won't happen again. Please keep us posted. I'll be thinking about you.

(((HUGS)))

ANd I want to add that you are not a failure!! You're a good Chi Mom. Please don't doubt yourself.


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## Cooper (Jun 15, 2005)

I'd go to the council and see if they can have the stick removed from that man's butt!

I can't see how they'd make you get rid of your dogs, especially if they were inside your home. I'd just wait and see what the council has to say before I got upset.


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## BonnieChi (Aug 12, 2005)

maybe it as just something he said in the heat of the moment...he probably won't actually do it?


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## my3angels (Apr 15, 2004)

Try to appologize...but sometimes people are just mean.
What is the max amount of dogs allowed for your city....I know we are allowed 5...but where i moved we are only allowed 2...so it depends...I would check on the rules.
If you are not breaking the rules then they cant do anything about it...he is just talk


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## fizzy n kirbys mum (Jan 17, 2005)

Zoe , sorry to hear you had a tough situation , please try not to worry to much ( I know that's easy for ME to say ) I am posertive that with just one complaint you will not be made to get rid of your dogs !! 
Maybe the man may not even phone the council , he may have just been 'mad' and as your mum was so upset she may have said the dogs have to go as she was in a state ... Give your mum a chance to calm down I know she really loves your dogs too ...

Sara xx

PS Zoe , you know where I am if you wanna talk give me a call


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## *Sarah* (Apr 19, 2005)

It should be ok as long as it doesnt happen again as the council would have to send out enviromental health to check to see the noise levels, They actually need to record it so they can play it back if there has to be a court proceeding. I personally woudlnt worry about it unless you plan on leaving them all alone anytime soon. Technically a complaint is a very long process can take months to go through and most people wouldnt wanna fill out all the paperwork over one inncident

This is what I found with my local council it might put your mind at rest as it speaks about repeat offending. 

*hugs* just dont worry Zoe no one is going to take your dogs ok 

http://www.epsom-ewell.gov.uk/epsom/services.nsf/pages/noise.html

If you look online under your local area/environmental health you should get the rules for your area etc 

Sarah


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## lecohen (Feb 13, 2005)

Hi there,

Sorry to hear what happened, hopefully it was just an empty threat and he said it in the heat of the moment.

How many dogs do you have?

You can always send a chi in my direction (loving and kind home awaits)...i have been wanting one for ages :lol: Sorry...:lol: 

I would suggest you apologise anyway and i really don't think anything will happen.

Good luck 

:wave:


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## lecohen (Feb 13, 2005)

...just saw you have 5 chis....LUCKY YOU!

Don't worry, it will blow over


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## xfayex (Apr 4, 2005)

Zoe dont worry its more and likely just a threat - if this has only happened on one occassion which you are sorry for and you will try to avoid in the future, i am very sure that they cant take your dogs off you.

Nemochi - that was very nice of you to post that!

and btw please dont say i'd rather be dead - you shouldnt be thinking that - i know if it ever come to it - which it wont - please think positive i know its hard. Im sorry you had to go through this! 
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## *Monster's Mum* (Aug 22, 2005)

As Nemochi said the council will not be able to do anything after just one occasion. Also the neighbours would have to keep a record of all 'incidents' and even record the noise. Therefore as long as this is not a regular occurrence you will be fine.  :wave:


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## sullysmum (Mar 6, 2004)

The neighbour might have seen you go out and deliberately made the dogs bark so he could then have a go at you, I've heard that happen several times where people don't get on.Don't worry and wait and see what, if anything the council says,we had a very noisy factory near us before we moved , we had the environmental noise people out all the time cause they would work 24/7 and constantly we would be woken up with metal crashing which when we were asleep would think was an explosion, it was a metal cutting RSJ type company, they had the noise machines in our home several times and even after complaining to our member of parliament they never closed them down or put a restriction on them, so in the end we moved.


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## Iamafairy (Jan 26, 2005)

Well I went round this morning and apologised and they just called me a stupid little girl. My mum is the one who is saying the dogs have to go she can't take the neighbour having ago. He picks on us for everything if our front lawns not mowed stupid things like that and it realyy wears my mum down. I have spoken to her this morning and she said that she has thought this through and its the only option. So its not really the neighbour its my mum!


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## chihuahua-lady (Apr 13, 2005)

oh im so sorry if your neighbor is giving you so much trouble why not go to the council about him keep knocking your door and moaning about everything its where you and your mm live and im sure you can cut your grass when you want and one complaint wont get you in trouble id say have you thought about training for your chis but they are naturally yappy little dogs mine are and the good thing is my neighbors have dogs as well


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## xfayex (Apr 4, 2005)

why do they have to go if its only this one occassion? If you both know its not going to happen again what is the problem? Hmm mums can be difficult - even if they are wrong they stick to there guns sometimes - its annoying.


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## Iamafairy (Jan 26, 2005)

She says she cant be sure its one occassion what if we both need to go out together and have to leave them. My mum wont even let them into the garden so shes using potty pads so i got mad at her and let them into the garden and neighbour raced to the fence. And imediatly they started barking. I think ill have to put some ads up for them.


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## JJ Ivy's mum! (Aug 23, 2005)

I feel so sorry for you. My neighbour sounds very much like yours. She complains about anything. She even reported us to the council because, GET THIS... my dogs' toe nails were making too much noise on our wooden floor and it was disturbing her!!!! She also reported us another time saying our staffy, Bullet howled when we went out. The thing was, the time she complained about we'd taken all the dogs with us so there were no dogs at home to howl!!! I complained to the council about her harrassment, and logged any incidents, and this seemed to stop her complaining. I also asked my neighbour on the other side if the dogs bothered her. She said no and I asked if she would tell the council this if necessary. The council took no further action against us either. Is your house owned by the council and is there a limit on how many dogs you can have? I own my flat but its in a council owned block. I'm only supposed to have two dogs but if they wanted to come and do a visit I'd ask my friend to look after Ivy for the day. Naughty I know! I hope you get this sorted out. Your neighbours sound horrible and you don't deserve to be made to feel this way by them. Take care, thinking of you xxx


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## carmella chihuahua (May 16, 2005)

zoey,are you sure?Maybe your mum just needs some calling off time.i think its definitly the neighbour,not the dogs which are a problem,unless they call the council and they come round saying you have to give up the dogs as it is a problem you shouldnt have to give up any but if your mum is seroius and doesnt change her mind but we are all desperatly hoping she does,maybe you could keep one or two?i dont like to even suggest this,but i dont know how serious the problem is yet,like if it is definite,and maybe there are some people on chi people who could look after your dogs for aweek or two and this mite make your mum change her mind if she realises how much she misses them maybe even i could lok after them for a week or two if it helps?My mum sometimes travels to north devon to visit her friend?If you want to talk,im on msn!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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## lecohen (Feb 13, 2005)

Hi Zoe,

I am so sorry that it has come to this, has your mum made up her mind that they HAVE to go? I feel really terrible for you.

I was serious though when i said that can offer a home to one but obviously i hope that you will get to keep your chis as i can see that it will break your heart to part with them.

I really hope that it will work out for you but PLEEEEASE consider me if you make the awful decision. I am based in London but would be willing to travel if necessary, you can pm me and we can talk directly.

Good luck and big hugs during this tough time.

Leena xxx


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## Rachael Polachek (Feb 19, 2005)

Iamafairy said:


> She says she cant be sure its one occassion what if we both need to go out together and have to leave them. My mum wont even let them into the garden so shes using potty pads so i got mad at her and let them into the garden and neighbour raced to the fence. And imediatly they started barking. I think ill have to put some ads up for them.


Why did you let them into the garden when you knew your mum didn't want that? Please try to work with your mum and not against her on this so you don't make things any worse.

I know chi's are considered a yappy breed but I've heard Lily bark exactly one time in over 3 years. The daycare - where she spends 10 hours a day - has heard her bark twice. Obviously not all chi's are yappy and they can definitely be trained not to bark. Why don't you try getting them some training before you do anything you and your mum will both regret?

Please make re-homing them an absolute last resort and not your first course of action. Surely your mum must know these dogs are your life and she can't possibly want to break your heart.


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## Jayne (Jul 8, 2005)

I hope this all blows over for you. Its a nasty situation , i expect you mum is being like this because she is worried about the neighbours.

Especially if the neighbours are not doggy people.

I hope this sorts itself out for you xx


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## Iamafairy (Jan 26, 2005)

Why did you let them into the garden when you knew your mum didn't want that? Please try to work with your mum and not against her on this so you don't make things any worse.

I let them into the garden as that is where they know to go toilet, I didn't want to confuse them even more.


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## lecohen (Feb 13, 2005)

Has your mum changed her mind at all?

I think that she is just reacting badly to your nasty neighbours...surely you could talk her round?!?


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## Rachael Polachek (Feb 19, 2005)

Sweetie, I think it sounded like I was blaming you in some way and I'm not. It did seem like you were doing something to spite your mum when you let the dogs into the garden but I know you're too smart for that. Shame on me.  

Why not let the dogs use wee wee pads in the house for awhile? So what if it confuses them a bit... lots better than having to re-home them. And it will give you time to work things out with your mum. You need to have her on your side so do whatever you can to let her know you're cooperating.

I'd still look at training as a solution to the barking problem. Wouldn't that just take the wind right out of the neighbor's sails if he saw all your dogs in your garden and not one of them barked?

This is too important to you and to your babies so don't give up hope. They need you to fight for them because they want to stay with you as much as you want to keep them. Be strong for them. And know that we're here for you to talk or vent or get advice. Everybody in this forum is on your side, honey. :wave:


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## TareG (Aug 13, 2005)

awww, I am very sorry, but I think your Ma just needs some cool off time. my Ma is the same exact way, and I can easily picture her saying something like that and then taking it back after some time has passed. Give her a chance...and maybe you could do something to show her how much the dogs love her! Maybe you could make her a card "from" the dogs and have them "sign it" saying I'm Sorry, or something. Or show her how good they are, and have them sit in her lap and give her kisses.

I think she'll come around, and don't think you're a failure. The neighbor just has a stick up his butt, like Coop's mom said, and you shouldn't need to deal with his issues.

I have faith that things will work out. And I am sorry for you, knowing how much this must hurt. but keep your chin up and wish for the best.


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## chihuahua-lady (Apr 13, 2005)

i really hope your mum changes her mind hun my mum has done that to me before but she never goes through with it she loves the dogs as much as me and im sure your mum loves them very much but is just worried by your nosey pain in the butt neighbor
 i can understand why she is stressed but you just have to really try and sweet talk her i know your chis mean so much to you so try your hardest and if you ever need a chat feel free to pm dont make any harsh decisions


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## Ed&EmsMom (Sep 6, 2005)

Why on earth would your neighbor run up to the fence when you let the dogs out to piddle?? :? It sounds to me as if this man is a bit of a bully. He obviously knows its just you and your Mom with no man around to stick up for you. It sounds as if he enjoys trying to intimidate you if he's complaining about such trivial things as lawn cutting. 

If I were you and your mother I would go to council or even to the police and ask their advise about what can be done with this man bullying you.


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## Seren (Apr 22, 2005)

Im so sorry this has happened to you! I too find myself that without a man here i sometimes feel vulnerable, and i would definately have been upset like your mum if a male neighbour had a go at me! This man is a total bully and i would definately ask the police advice about him harrasing you. Why the heck shouldnt you be able to take your dogs into your own garden! The situation is terrible for you but please seek advice from the council too, before you make any drastic desicions about selling your dogs.
S xxx


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## chimom (Apr 1, 2005)

Ed&EmsMom said:


> Why on earth would your neighbor run up to the fence when you let the dogs out to piddle?? :? It sounds to me as if this man is a bit of a bully. He obviously knows its just you and your Mom with no man around to stick up for you. It sounds as if he enjoys trying to intimidate you if he's complaining about such trivial things as lawn cutting.
> 
> If I were you and your mother I would go to council or even to the police and ask their advise about what can be done with this man bullying you.


I agree completely. He's attempting to intimidate your mom, and he is apparently doing a pretty good job of it. I don't know why some people have to be such jerks! :x Unfortunately, there are lots of people like that around. They are miserable, and they just try to make everyone as miserable as they are. Sad, but true. 

I'm not familiar with the laws in your country, but I can't imagine having to get rid of your dogs because of one complaint. That's just not logical. Give your mom some time to calm down, and in the meantime don't do anything to aggravate the situation.


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## nabi (Nov 25, 2004)

I'm sorry you have had to have this upset ..... but I am going to take the unpopular side of the issue and suggest you may have too many chi's...if you only had one or two, the neighbour and your mother may not have such an issue with noise...having said that..I realize you love each of your chi's. and I would not want to be in that situation.....but maybe rehoming a couple of the chi's would be the best solution..when I lived in town, the total number of dogs each home could have was 2...please do not ever think things are so bad you don't want to go on...you have some little ones that count on you...like it or not !


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## kealohalinaka (Sep 22, 2005)

If you live in a condo... yes, the HOA (home owner association) can have your dogs removed off the property. As an owner, you're suppose to have control over your dogs. But if this happened only that one time. I believed your neighbor had over reacted. I would have understand if this is an on going thing. 

Perhaps, you can buy the bark collar or have a spray bottle (filled with water) ready to spray at your dogs face when they bark. Then eventually, they'll be so scare that even when you grab any bottle, they'll stay quiet. Also, instead of having tons of toys around. You should really consider buying the kong. It'll keep them busy and they won't miss you when you leave, cause they'll be too busy searching for the treat in the kong.

Good luck! I know how hard it is... because chihuahua is known for their barking.


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## LadybugLuv (Sep 21, 2005)

Your neighbor is the biggest bully! Your dogs can definately sense that he is threatening your family, otherwise they would not have ran up to him and started barking. Sounds like they thought they had to protect you. A real man would not make threats or rudely confront any woman. I would not think twice about reporting him to the council--since this is regular behavior for him. Also, he had no right to run up to the fence and make comments about what you were doing in your private area. It seems like he is doing what he can to provoke the dogs, which will help his case.


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## paint my world (Jan 26, 2005)

Hey

I just think if it's not your dogs it will be something else they'll find to moan about and if they see you getting rid of them they'll know they can make you do anything the want in the future. 

My boyfriends mum has the worst ever neighbours. She's finally sold her house because of it. I think I would do the same thing. Your house is your own personal space where you spend time at, if your not feel happy there because of other people then what else can you do, You dont wanna live like that forever

I hope you manage to talk your mum round. I know I could never forgive mine if she tried to make me do that. How old are you, cant you tel her you'll move into your own place if it means keeping your dogs?


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## JJ Ivy's mum! (Aug 23, 2005)

Hi, how are things today? I hope they're working themselves out. Take care xxx


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## Iamafairy (Jan 26, 2005)

Hey all for your nice comments.

Well the house is on the market and we are going to move. We moved here only a year ago thought it would be a nice place to live with the dogs as it has a big wood directly behind. Our house is completly our own and is detached. My mum was speaking to another person in the road and he told her that our neighbours had made the previous people want to move.
Im only 15 so can't move out PROPERLY yet. Maybe I have too many dogs. Maybe i will get rid of some.


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## JJ Ivy's mum! (Aug 23, 2005)

It's dreadful that you are going to have to move because of your bullying neighbours.  Your mum needs to report them. This is so unfair. :evil: If your house is detached I don't see how the neighbours could be disturbed anyway. I've got neighbours joined on each side and above so I do know that mine could be disturbed but in a detached house I bet they hardly hear anything from your dogs. They sound really horrible. Please don't part with any of your dogs, because then the bullies have won.


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## chihuahua-lady (Apr 13, 2005)

i know how much you love you chis if you have to get rid of some how could you possibly choose


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## paint my world (Jan 26, 2005)

Yeah, how could you chose and won't they miss eachother if they are parted?


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## Iamafairy (Jan 26, 2005)

nabi said:


> and suggest you may have too many chi's...quote]
> 
> But how mant people are going to think this?????


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## chihuahua-lady (Apr 13, 2005)

if you feel you have to many to cope with then its rite that you let them go to new homes but i thought you could cope you have been fine til this neighbor inccident havent you how old are all your chis anyway now and which ones would you keep


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## paint my world (Jan 26, 2005)

Id say left the youngest go if yiu HAVE to let any go as they wont be sooo attached as your older chi's How come you have so many anyway? Did you get a few at the same time? are any of them related?


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## Iamafairy (Jan 26, 2005)

Thats my point i have coped fine. I can cope with my dogs fine. to be honest I know people who have many more odgs than me.


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## chihuahua-lady (Apr 13, 2005)

i have quite a few chis now but like i said in a earlier post my neighbors both sides are dog lovers and thats a bonus but i couldnt be with out them if i was having probs with the neighbors id prob do what your doing and move but thats coz i couldnt part with any of my babies
i hope it all works out for you zoe and that you find them great homes if need be


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## lecohen (Feb 13, 2005)

Hi Zoe,

Hope that you are ok today...

Can't believe your mum is considering moving, she should report the bullying neighbours for sure!

How are your chis today?

Big hugs

Leena x


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## TareG (Aug 13, 2005)

I think that you are the only one who can truly know whether or not you have too many chis. Are you able to give them all love and make them all happy? Are you able to take them all to the vets and care for them properly as far as health goes? And can you fit them all comfortably in your home and keep them and the house clean? If so, I think you and the chis are living a pretty good life together, and that you should keep it that way. Just change the location.

Someone else mentioned (sorry, I can't remember who  ) that if it wasn't the dogs the neighbor would just go after you about something else, and I agree. So therefore I don;t think that getting rid of any dogs would solve anything, cuz he would just find something else to gripe about.


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## janiebabes (Mar 30, 2004)

Maybe the move is for the best. if opted to get rid of my chi's for barking as much as I am against it I would debark them. they can still baark but its raspy sound. We just had thos conversation on another list somehave done it. I myself wouldnt unless there was no other choice and training failed


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