# Just wondering...



## * Bailey & Kahlua's Mom * (Nov 10, 2008)

How many of you have your Chi's because you have found out you can't have children? It seems like there are a few of us on here ... sadly.

After many, many years of trying to get pregnant and a few miscarriages, Bailey very much fills my unfulfilled motherly needs... You all probably think I am insane, Bailey _is_ my son.... He is more to me then a "dog", he gives me reason to get out of bed in the morning and something to focus my love and affection on.... He makes me happy! 

So, how many of you also feel/think the same way about your Chi? Or, does hubby need to call the men in the white coats to come and take me away?


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## Ciarra (May 6, 2008)

Well I bought Kirby when I was a Senior in Highschool, I use to joke to my friends that I could get into a good relationship so I needed a dog. But soon after getting Kirby I started dating someone and after dating him for almost 2 years we got married. I kept getting more chihuahuas and they felt like my babies. We werent trying nor did we care if we had children. We knew it would happen one day. Unexpectly it did, come to find out Im pregnant and were about to be parents. Its alitte scary because taking care of dogs is so much easier. But Im happy nonetheless.


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## LittleHead (May 20, 2004)

I don't belong in this thread but I would like to share that I would like to one day marry a man who is a dog lover, or at least tolerable of them  Right now, I'm a no on kids. But, every once in a while, I do think about being a mom.


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## rebel_yell (Mar 24, 2008)

You are not alone in your thinking/feelings. My husband and I are not able to have children and Bruce and Lola probably receive alot of my diverted maternal instincts. Anyone who knows me knows that I've always been a hard core animal lover and animal rights defender, but as I've gotten older, I would say that Bruce and Lola do help fill that "gap".


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## Chico's Mum (Sep 9, 2008)

I'm not married and like *LittleHead* I would like to marry a man who is a animal lover. And gets along with My Chico. 
But I do want kids lots of them.  Chico makes me happy more then anything. He is my son and my first love. And even if/when I have kids. That well never change. :daisy:


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## Kioana (Mar 1, 2005)

Again another non married person, Me i'm not really wanting to have kids so I have my fur kids and they are just as good. I have to do the very same thing that i would have to do with real kids. 

So i'm like a mom with 9 kids 

I've saw on a show that the reason why chihuahuas are so popural beause they "look" like babies. 

The big eyes , small bodies, can be held like babies, you get that "aww" look with them threw out their years, they are low to the ground like babies.when you get a new chi you spend more time on the floor!


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## rhaubejoi (Dec 10, 2008)

I was told when I was 16 that I would never be able to carry a baby. That if I ever got pregnant the baby would spontaneously abort and I would never know that I had gotten preg, or that if the embryo somehow managed to find a way to cling and start growing I would hemhorrage and die with it. 
I have a son. He is 9 1/2 and he is my husbands son from his first marriage. His mother didnt want him and totally abandoned him at 18 months, so she isnt in the picture and I am the one who takes care of him and teaches him the mom things. I met them when he was 3.
I also have a cousin who has a baby girl who I keep so much that we have joked she is my stepdaughter. she will be 3 in may. 
but, yes, Zoe is my baby. partly because she is MY baby and no one else's and will always be mine. as will the new baby. maybe more to come later.


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## catz4m8z (Aug 28, 2008)

I never really wanted kids, I only feel maternal towards small furry things!! However my animals are my family, as I was bullied, by kids at school and strangers in the street until I was in my mid twenties so I really dont have any trust in people whatsoever. How I ended up a nurse Im not sure!!
Its not suprising that our dogs become surrogate kids, they are totally dependant on us, trusting and give unconditional love. My dogs have definately become like my children and woe betide anyone who says that they are 'just dogs'.
So maybe they should send the men in white coats for all of us!!


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## Brodysmom (Jan 8, 2009)

I'm kind of on the other end of the spectrum. My kids are growing up and I will have an empty house in the fall when my youngest goes off to college. The empty nest scenario is really true and just thinking about it really was making me depressed and sad. So we decided to get a puppy to fill that void. 

Yes, I have kids, (and they are great) but Brody is my BABY. 

Brodysmom


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## BABY BABS (Feb 5, 2008)

My Hubby and I have no children. Our pets are our children. And yes I think the chis filled a little part of me that wanted to be a mom too. They are my babies.


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## Mandy (Jan 16, 2009)

hi i have 2 kids dionne who is a teenager at 13 and my wee dane who is 8
but knew i would not be having anymore kids so i think the substitutes are my other 2 babies my chis zac nd honey when asked if i have kids i always say yes 4 including my chi's

x


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## * Bailey & Kahlua's Mom * (Nov 10, 2008)

I knew I wasn't the only one that seen their little four legged monkey's as baby's! 

Its very hard facing the fact of never having a kid. I've wanted one since I was a kid myself. After becoming pregnant and then having miscarriages after seeing them on the ultrasound, it was the most horrible thing to have to get through. Even now I still grieve for them. But, guess its not in the cards for me, as they say. 

At least Bailey helps fill that tremendous void, I thank God that I have him! I can't wait to get his sister later this year.


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## jeanie brown (Jan 5, 2009)

I have 2 grown up kids so dodgy is my baby ,


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## Lyanne (Oct 29, 2008)

I don't really belong in this thread but as everyone else has shared their personal cirumstances it seemed rude not to...I have a 7 year old daughter, conceived naturally and quickly....however since then have suffered miscarriages and very unsuccessfully failed to have another child. I have always loved chis and decided to get one for the WHOLE family and I suppose a little of that was to fill a gap. Since then number 2 chi has come along and I am not as obsessed with analysing the WHY's and WHAT IF's as much. I feel very moved to have had the priveledge to read so many personal things from people x


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## lilbabyvenus (Feb 8, 2009)

You know you're not alone  I would be lost without my little Venus. Even if by some miracle we are able to have a baby someday, Venus will always be my daughter.


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## catalat (Apr 21, 2008)

Aww that is so sad.. I am sorry you can't have kids but I am sure that Bailey is the best fur son you could have asked for. I am not sure if I want kids ( I still have lots of time to decide I am only 20) but I totally consider Chloe as my little girl... My entire day revolves around her...haha I feel so crazy ..people can't believe all the stuff I do with her and all the money I spend on her. But I wouldn't have it any other way.


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## Pinkchi (Nov 21, 2008)

I think it's so sad that the people who really want kids can't have them, yet people who can choose not to, it seems like such a waste. I wish they could like transplant wombs or something......

Anyway....at 18 i've pretty much been against having kids from day one. The whole 'being a mom' and the whole 'pregnancy' thing just terrifys me.
I've also never felt any maternal instincts what-so-ever. However i work at a boarding kennels and always feel much closer to the 4-legged furry beasts. Theres just something about dogs that just makes me love them. I know that when i get my chihuahua it will be my baby in every way shape and form x


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## Kioana (Mar 1, 2005)

wow Pinkchi, lol you pretty much said how i feel


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## * Bailey & Kahlua's Mom * (Nov 10, 2008)

> I think it's so sad that the people who really want kids can't have them, yet people who can choose not to, it seems like such a waste. I wish they could like transplant wombs or something......


Its hard, very hard. You see these horrible things in the news about babies being abandoned, children being abused ... 13 year olds having babies because "they feel they are ready" and don't get me started on the abortion issue etc... its hard. Before Bailey, I spent a lot of time aching and longing to have one of my own, I still do, don't get me wrong... but Bailey eases _a lot_ of that heart break, I don't cry even a fraction of the amount I used to and over all, I am happier. 

We have looked into adoption, everything is just unbelievably *so* expensive and so time consuming. We may end up fostering some day, just have to wait and see.

I still pray and hope for a miracle, because it would take one in my situation.... I hope every day that I will still get to be a mom, but I will be 32 this year, so my time is running out.  Its been 13 years (with many expensive fertility treatments) that we have been trying to become parents. We finally stopped last year, so now, if its _meant_ to be... it will be. As my grandma says "Let go and let God" 

Sorry to ramble .... lol 

HURRAY for the sweet lil furry Chi's, they make the world a better place! :cheer::cheer::cheer:


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## SillySally (Jan 2, 2009)

My son is grown and moved out. I got spayed right after my son turned 5yrs old. I knew then I didn't want anymore and neither did my hubby. Probably is why we have all girl dogs is because we never had a human girl 

I married my high school sweetheart and we are coming up on our 27th anniversary.


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## Kioana (Mar 1, 2005)

BaileysMommy said:


> We have looked into adoption, everything is just unbelievably *so* expensive and so time consuming. We may end up fostering some day, just have to wait and see.


 
That's why the world is soo messed up! It shouldn't cost an arm and leg just to give a kid/baby a home:foxes15:
** added *** I know it cost for them to care for a child but from what i hear it's alot up in the 1,000's *****


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## kobi0326 (Jun 13, 2008)

My husband and I are also not able to have children, so Kobi and Butters are our babies. Seriously...they have so many traits of a mischievious 2 year old (stubborness, pouting, etc), how could they be anything but our little babies?? They have certainly filled a void in our lives and it makes me wonder now why we waited so long to get a dog.


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## toby'smom (Jun 11, 2006)

I am a very private person, but I guess I can tell you all some of my story, because it will make more sense why toby is so important to me.  I got pregnant had a miscarriage, then couldn't get preg. again. we went through a few fertility things then decided to adopt. I always thought after we adopted we would get pregnant. had some surgery doc said not having babies even with fertility two weeks later I got toby. now I know he is not a human but he means more to me than "just a dog" I don't think people can sometimes understand that. that is also the reason my husband and I are working so hard to keep toby (the biting incident on friday) because he is just so important to me. He really has helped me move on to where I am now.


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## pinkglitterybunny (Jul 26, 2008)

im another 'my chi is my baby person'  im not sure weather I can have kids or not, but myself feel im too young and have too many things id like to do before i evern think about babies, although im planning to marry my fella either next year or the year after.

Im 24 and never been maternal but you never know how you will feel in 5 years or so (i used to hateeee when people said that to me when i was in my teens but you grow up and realise its true!!)

But precious is my baby and my child and fella thinks the same, we are just happy  xx

I would never ever ever even entertain a man that didnt like animals. iv always been told not to trust people who dislike animals,...! x 

My heart goes out to all of you that have had sadness over pregnancys x


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## * Bailey & Kahlua's Mom * (Nov 10, 2008)

Kioana said:


> That's why the world is soo messed up! It shouldn't cost an arm and leg just to give a kid/baby a home:foxes15:
> ** added *** I know it cost for them to care for a child but from what i hear it's alot up in the 1,000's *****


Yes, its way up there! We fell in love with this beautiful little girl, she was 3 years old and simply everything we could have hoped for... it would have been over $10,000 for her... NOT including the court costs and the home study! That was for the adoption agency costs! PLUS not only after you pay all of that... the birth mother can still come back to claim the child if she all of a sudden changes her mind. 

We just couldn't afford all of that, especially with the "no guarantees and no refunds" attached to it. Sooooo many children out there needing homes, yet those of us who WANT to give them homes honestly can't afford all of the costs just to get them home, let alone all the care for them and a college fund on top of all the before costs... its insane! :foxes15:


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## * Bailey & Kahlua's Mom * (Nov 10, 2008)

Toby's Mom, your little girl is adopted? May I ask what agency you when through and if the costs were as insane as I've come across?! Thanks!

Yeah, I understand what ya mean... they are MORE then "just dogs"!


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## catz4m8z (Aug 28, 2008)

Aww, Bailey's Mom Im so glad you have your little monkey to fill some of the hole in your heart. Adoption is different in the UK, although its a long difficult procedure no money changes hands. When you see famous couples like Brangelina strolling around collecting children like holiday souvenirs it must seem so unfair.


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## rhaubejoi (Dec 10, 2008)

catz4m8z said:


> When you see famous couples like Brangelina strolling around collecting children like holiday souvenirs it must seem so unfair.


you got that right honey! pisses me right the h*** off! :foxes15: I will spare you all and not tell you about the baby me and my ex were about to adopt, but the system over here sucks alot!:foxes15:


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## Kioana (Mar 1, 2005)

BaileysMommy said:


> Yes, its way up there! We fell in love with this beautiful little girl, she was 3 years old and simply everything we could have hoped for... it would have been over $10,000 for her... NOT including the court costs and the home study! That was for the adoption agency costs! PLUS not only after you pay all of that... the birth mother can still come back to claim the child if she all of a sudden changes her mind.
> 
> We just couldn't afford all of that, especially with the "no guarantees and no refunds" attached to it. Sooooo many children out there needing homes, yet those of us who WANT to give them homes honestly can't afford all of the costs just to get them home, let alone all the care for them and a college fund on top of all the before costs... its insane! :foxes15:


 
WOW! 10,000 PLUS?! that's crazy so your BUYING a child. i don't think it's right that you spead all that money for the child and the "mother" can say oh i want my baby back. crazy

also with angie,Brad,madonna ect is a slap in the face for people who are adopting, they get their child right away but other people have to wait years.


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## Brodysmom (Jan 8, 2009)

One of my good friends at work used the Holt Agency and went to China for their little girl. The wait was 2 years and their fees added up to $21,000. She is a gorgeous little girl though and they took out loans and are just paying them back slowly.


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## * Bailey & Kahlua's Mom * (Nov 10, 2008)

> also with angie,Brad,madonna ect is a slap in the face for people who are adopting, they get their child right away but other people have to wait years.


Yep, it must be nice to be richer then rich! Not to mention having hired help to raise all of them..... ah well.


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## * Bailey & Kahlua's Mom * (Nov 10, 2008)

> WOW! 10,000 PLUS?! that's crazy so your BUYING a child. i don't think it's right that you spead all that money for the child and the "mother" can say oh i want my baby back. crazy


That is exactly what it is, BUYING a child like they are property. As for the mother (or other family member) coming back for them, it happens all the time! 



> One of my good friends at work used the Holt Agency and went to China for their little girl. The wait was 2 years and their fees added up to $21,000. She is a gorgeous little girl though and they took out loans and are just paying them back slowly.


We looked at over seas adoption, the costs are just to much to even consider!


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## Brodysmom (Jan 8, 2009)

BaileysMommy said:


> That is exactly what it is, BUYING a child like they are property. As for the mother (or other family member) coming back for them, it happens all the time!
> 
> 
> 
> We looked at over seas adoption, the costs are just to much to even consider!


Yes, adoption is expensive. My friend Gary and his wife went to China for their little girl though because they didn't want any possibility of the birth mom coming back someday to get the kid or changing her mind, etc. They didn't want an open adoption. So they chose China. I was like "$20K plus?! Holy Cow!" but he told me that they just thought of it as some people buy cars costing more than that and this is an investment for a lifetime that will never depreciate.  They are in debt over it, yes, but he said they wouldn't change a thing. 

Brodysmom


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## rocky scotland (Jun 15, 2008)

Aww so glad that Bailey your lovable monkey is helping you get over your heartbreak. What a sad thread this is, unbelievable so many of you cant have kids, I am 26 and want kids someday and you just think that it will defo happen one day but you just never know. So many kids out there abused, unwanted, babys having babys themselves its so sad.

For now Rocky is defo my baby, nobody really understands me tho. Like I wont leave him running out in the garden himself in case a cat comes and attacks him, he escapes, gets stolen etc etc ect.....my work collegues think im mad!! Hes my baby and I love him so much.

When the day comes that I have a baby (I hope) I am wondering how Rocky would react to this. Anyone have any info?? I know that chis are not great dogs with kids and I am a little worried at the prospect of starting a family.


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## Brenda (Jul 28, 2008)

My family brother and sister in law are going through a bad time.
When through in vitro twice with a false positive pregnancy test. Now trying to adopt.
Have had two adoptions fail. One this week. They have two dog but she is obsessed with having a baby.
I wish she could find some peace.


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## Chili-mom (Sep 7, 2008)

It must be so hard wanting a child and unable to even adopt. I dont have kids but never really wanted any. Ive always thought of my pets as my children and will protect them and pick there side of the story just like if they were ppl kids. so know you are crazy for thinking of bailey as you child.


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